kkchin's Blog

Move to new blog

2010-04-20T17:06:00.000-07:00

My Dear Friends,

Start from 21/4/2010, I will stop posting any articles to this blog, because I have just setup my new blog at www.chinkk.com, feel free to visit ya.

KK

7 Key Steps to Closing Every Sale - By Rochelle Togo-Figa

2010-04-10T17:37:00.000-07:00

When a client tells me they're not bringing in the sales they want, one of the first questions I ask is "Are you asking for the business?" Their response is either "No, I don't know what to say" or "What if I ask and they're not interested"? Well, if you don't ask, you'll never know where you stand with your prospect.

The close is a crucial moment of decision in the sales process when the prospect decides whether to enter into a business relationship with you or not. For many people this is such a painful time, that 50% of all sales calls end without asking for some sort of commitment to the next steps.

Let me share a story with you. Jim and Ron were friends for more than 25 years and golf buddies for nearly the same amount of time. They had grown up together, were as close as brothers celebrating each other's personal and professional business successes over the years. One day while they're teeing off, Jim turned to Ron and said "Ron, how come after all the years we've known each other, you've never given me any business?" Ron turned to Jim and simply said "You never asked". This response may sound surprising but it's true. The most common reason business owners don't get the business is they don't ask for it. It's as simple as that. If you want the business, you must ask for it.

Let's take a look at 7 key steps to asking for the business.

1. Prepare Yourself for the Close
There are a number of questions to answer before you ask for the business. Once you answer "yes" to these questions, you're ready to ask the closing questions. Here are a few questions to ask yourself:

Does the customer want what I'm selling?
Does the customer believe in me and my company?
Can the customer afford my product?
Does the customer fully understand what my product is?
Have I prepared and practiced my closing techniques?
Am I prepared to remain silent after asking the closing question?

2. Trial Closes
Throughout the sales meeting, look for opportunities to get agreement from the prospect. Repeat back to the prospect what they told you is important to them and tie it back to the benefits. Here's an example: "Don't you agree, it's going to give you the financial security you said earlier is so important to you?"

Checking in with them throughout the meeting and getting agreement allows you to use the information as you prepare for the close. If your prospect agrees, you can bring them back to that at the end.

3. Assumptive Close
From the moment you walk in and sit down with the prospect, assume the prospect wants to buy your product. If they are willing to meet with you, they must have some interest in what you're selling. If you continually assume the sale over and over in your own mind, you'll project that confidence in your speaking when meeting with the project. Here's several assumptive statements you can make before the prospects buys:

"You'll be happy you decided to buy it."
You're going to love how it looks in your home."

4. Ask Pressure-Free Closing Questions
As the prospect gets closer to making a decision to do business with you or not, their level of anxiety increases. This is an uncertain time for the prospect in the decision-making process, and the sale can go either way. The way to keep the sales door open and lead the prospect to doing business with you, is asking pressure-free questions. The magic word to use when asking a pressure-free question is "if". The word "if", removes all risk and pressure from the question. The prospect will respond freely as there is no commitment to be made at this time. Here's a couple of examples:

If you were to go ahead with... when would you...?
If you were to decide to... how many would you...?

5. Ask Closing Questions
There is no need to break your momentum now. Here are a few questions you can ask potential clients in order to reach an agreement.

"Are you ready to get started?"
"Shall I draw up a contract?"
"Do we have a deal?"
"Let's take a few minutes now so I can walk you through the agreement."
"Let's set up our next meeting and I can go over the plan with you then."
"Shall I finalize the details?"

6. Be Quiet! Let Them Respond First
The biggest flaw leading to failing to close the sale is the inability to know when and how to ask for it and then be quiet. After you've made your recommendation and asked all your closing questions, remain silent. The prospect has listened to your presentation and needs a couple of moments to absorb the information and make the buying decision. Take a deep breath, be quiet and wait for the prospect to speak first.

7. Decide on the Next Steps
Whether or not you have closed the sale, be absolutely certain that both you and the prospect know what happens next. Before you end your meeting with the prospect, take out your calendar and set up the next meeting, or the next call. Never leave a meeting without knowing the next steps.

If you like what you read in this article and want to learn more sales strategies that will increase your sales immediately, then I'm ready to walk you through my proven step-by-step sales and mindset breakthrough system at the Inner Game of Sales Breakthrough Workshop. For 3 incredible days in June I will teach you everything you need to close more sales and shift the way you think about sales. Now is the time to master your sales and mindset so that this is your best year ever! The Inner Game of Sales Workshop will change the way YOU think about sales and selling FOREVER!

** To comment on this article or to read comments about this article, go here.

About the Author:

Rochelle Togo-Figa, The Sales Breakthrough Expert, is the creator of the Sales Breakthrough System™, a proven step-by-step sales process that will help you close more sales, sign on more clients and make more money with ease and velocity. To sign up for her free sales articles and teleclasses on closing more sales, visit http://www.SalesBreakthroughs.com .

An Accumulation of Riches

2010-04-10T17:22:00.001-07:00

By: Brian Tracy

Little Things Mean A Lot
One of the greatest success principles of all is called the Law of Accumulation. This law says that everything great and worthwhile in human life is an accumulation of hundreds and sometimes thousands of tiny efforts and sacrifices that nobody ever sees or appreciates. It says that everything accumulates over time. That you have to put in many, many, many tiny efforts that nobody sees or appreciates before you achieve anything worthwhile. It's like a snowball. A snowball starts very small, but it grows as it adds millions and millions of tiny snowflakes and continues to grow as it gathers momentum.

Learn What You Need To Learn
There are three areas where the law of accumulation is important. The first is in the area of knowledge. Your body of knowledge is a result of hundreds, perhaps thousands, of small pieces of information.

Any person with a large knowledge base has spent thousands of hours building that knowledge base one piece at a time. And what you see when you meet the individual is an expert in his or her field, with that high level of knowledge that makes him very valuable in the marketplace.

Save Your Money
The second area where the Law of accumulation works is with regard to money. Every large fortune is an accumulation of hundreds and thousands of small amounts of money, and the place to start is to take any amount of money that you can right now and begin to save it. When you begin to save money, it sets up a force field of energy and it triggers the law of attraction. As a result you begin to attract to you even more bits of money to add to your savings.

"Learn and Remember Faster and Easier Than Ever Before"

In the 21st Century, the only skill that won't become obsolete is the ability to learn. Nowadays, your ability to learn new processes can drastically improve your earning potential. Learning is a lot like exercising: it's an activity that must be done often to attain maximum results.
Learn more here >>

Attract Riches Into Your Life
And I've spoken to many, many successful people and they've told me the same story. That as soon as you start to put savings aside, it starts to attract into your life and into your work all the money that you need to achieve your goals. The reason why most people retire poor is they never put the initial savings aside to start with.

Get The Experience You Need
The third area where the law of accumulation applies is in the area of experience. You'll find that successful people in any field are those who have far more experience in that field than the average. And there is nothing that replaces experience. Whether it's in business or entrepreneurship or management or parenting or selling or anything else. Many people do not take the risks that are necessary to move out of their comfort zone because they're afraid it won't work out.

Everything Counts
But the fact is that until you move out of the comfort zone and get the experience from making the mistakes, it's not possible for you to grow and become capable of earning the kind of money that you desire. Now here's the key to the law of accumulation. It says that everything counts. Everything that you do counts. The biggest mistake that people make is they think that only what they want to count, counts. That when you read a book, when you listen to an audio program, when you go to a course, when you go to bed early and you get up early and you work, it all counts. And it's all going on the plus side of your ledger.

Use Your Time Well
But when you watch television, waste time, hang out, fool around and so on, all of that counts, as well, and it's going on the negative side. A person who has a great life, by the law of accumulation, is a person who's accumulated far more credits on the credit side than debits on the debit side. And here's an important point. If what you are doing is not moving you towards your goals, then it's moving you away from your goals. Nothing is neutral. Everything that you're doing is either moving you toward the things that you want to accomplish in life, the person you want to be, the wealth you want to accumulate, or it's moving you away. Everything counts. The law of accumulation says that everything counts.

Action Exercises
First, begin today to build your knowledge base in the subject that can be most helpful to you in achieving financial independence. Whether it takes a week, a month or a year to become thoroughly knowledgeable, it doesn't matter. Just get started today.

Second, get as much experience as you can in your chosen field. Start a little earlier, work a little harder and stay a little later. Take risks and try every different way you can think of to achieve your goal. This experience is invaluable and it accumulates over time.

It Pays to be Nice ... and CALM!

2010-04-01T17:59:00.000-07:00

by Jack Canfield

The North Wind boasted of great strength. The Sun argued that there was great power in gentleness.

“We shall have a contest,” said the Sun.

Far below, a man traveled a winding road. He was wearing a warm winter coat.

“As a test of strength,” said the Sun, “Let us see which of us can take the coat off of that man.”

“It will be quite simple for me to force him to remove his coat,” bragged the Wind.
The Wind blew so hard, the birds clung to the trees. The world was filled with dust and leaves. But the harder the wind blew down the road, the tighter the shivering man clung to his coat.
Then, the Sun came out from behind a cloud. Sun warmed the air and the frosty ground. The man on the road unbuttoned his coat.

The sun grew slowly brighter and brighter.

Soon the man felt so hot, he took off his coat and sat down in a shady spot.

“How did you do that?” said the Wind.

“It was easy,” said the Sun, “I lit the day. Through gentleness I got my way.”

# # #

Today’s featured article was an easy one for me. In this world of increased stress, financial pressures, pink slips, traffic jams and cancelled flights, it pays to know how to stay centered and calm—how to interact like the sun and not the wind.

Believe it or not, it's a critical success strategy.

Pamela Bruner is one of my students. She is a graduate of my seven-day Breakthrough to Success Summer Training (this year August 8-14), a participant in my year-long Train the Trainer Mentorship Program, and a member of my Platinum Inner Circle Master Mind Group.

Pamela is a master practitioner of the success principles I teach, and is currently working on a book with me applying the principles and techniques of the Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) to removing the emotional blocks and limiting beliefs that confront people when they attempt to apply the 64 success principles that I teach in my book The Success Principles: How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be.

She sent me and an e-mail earlier this month that shows just how valuable it is to stay calm, expect the best, believe it’s possible to get what you want no matter what is happening around you, and to take action to produce the desired result.

Here is Pamela’s e-mail. I hope it will uplift and inspire you as much as it did me.

More importantly I hope it will serve as a valuable lesson for what to do if you find yourself in a similar situation—trying to get from where you are to where you want to be…when all the flights to where you want to be are being cancelled!

# # #

I was flying to West Palm Beach to film a TV spot for my husband Dave’s company, Heartland Harps. My plane was supposed to arrive at 8pm, and we needed to be in the studio at 7:30 am the next morning. The film crew would be there, waiting. My flight was delayed, and then delayed 3 more times. At 9:50pm, they announced that they were waiting for a call from the higher ups as to whether the flight would be cancelled.

Many people were angry, and were yelling at the two USAir representatives behind the counter. I went over and said to one of the reps, “The flight might still go, is that right?”

She replied, “I really think that they’ll cancel it at this point.”

I said, “I really need to be in Boca Raton tomorrow morning at 7:30am. I’m not upset, but I’ve got a film crew waiting for me. Is there any way you can help me?”

She went around the corner, and a few minutes later she beckoned me over. “There’s a flight leaving for Ft. Lauderdale at 10:15. It’s oversold, but I might be able to get you on it. I think they’ll lose a few people.”

I said, “It’s 9:55 now. Can I make it?”

She replied, “It’s been delayed also. Go now!” As I grabbed the new boarding pass she’d printed for me, I thanked her profusely, and as I ran away, she said, “It pays to be nice…and quiet!”

I ran to the other terminal, exchanged my new boarding pass for one with an actual seat assignment (hurray!) and waited. The plane didn’t leave until midnight, and I got in at 2am. All around me I heard people grumbling about the delays, the service, etc. All I was thinking was how grateful I was to have made it before my 7:30am deadline.

I did see a few people from my West Palm Beach flight come over to the Ft. Lauderdale flight, but no one else got on. I was the only one who made it that night!

Thank you Spirit!!

The Success Principles employed:

—#4: Believe It’s Possible and You Get What You Expect
—#55: Be a Class Act, and
—#17: Ask, Ask, Ask!

Warmly, Pamela

# # #

This is a great example of how applying the principles can literally get you from where you are to want to be…when everyone else is being left behind. Try a little kindness and be a class act.

As Pamela’s story illustrates, warm sunshine works a lot better than a harsh wind.

The Determinant of Your Success

2010-03-31T04:09:00.000-07:00

By: Brian Tracy

Perhaps the most powerful single factor in your financial success is your beliefs about yourself and money. We call this the Law of Belief. It says simply this: Whatever you believe, with feeling, becomes your reality.

What Successful People Believe
Whatever you intensely believe becomes your reality. That we have a tendency to block out any information coming in to us that is inconsistent with our reality. What we've discovered is that successful people absolutely believe that they have the ability to succeed. And they will not entertain, think about, or talk about the possibilities that they'll fail. They do not even consider the possibility of failure.

Positive Thinking Versus Positive Knowing
You always act in a matter consistent with your beliefs. The most important belief system you can build is a prosperity consciousness where you absolutely believe that you are going achieve your financial goals. We call this positive knowing versus positive thinking. Positive thinking can sometimes be wishing or hoping. But positive knowing is when you absolutely know that no matter what, you will be successful.

The Foundation of Willpower
Another principle related to your beliefs is willpower. We know that willpower is essential to any success. Willpower is based on confidence. It's based on conviction. It's based on faith. It's based on your belief in your ability to triumph over all obstacles. And you can develop willpower by persistence, by working on your goals, by reading the biographies of successful people, by listening to audio programs, by reading books about people who've achieved success. The more information you take into your mind consistent with success, the more likely it is that you will develop the willpower to push you through the obstacles and difficulties you will experience.

"Accomplish More in a Month Than Most People Accomplish in a Year"

Your ability to discipline yourself "to do what you should, when you should do it, whether you feel like it or not," is the key to becoming a great person and living a great life. When you develop the habits of self-discipline, you will accomplish more in a month than most people accomplish in a year. Click for more >>

Beat the Odds on Success
Remember that success is rare. Only one person in one hundred becomes wealthy in the course of a lifetime. Only five percent achieve financial independence. That means that the odds against you are 19-to-1. The only way that you're going to achieve your financial goals is if you get really serious. To succeed, you must get serious. You must get busy. You must get active. You must get going. Remember, everything counts.

Resolve to Achieve Greatly
Self-mastery, self-control, self-discipline are essential for anyone who wants to achieve greatly. And control over your thoughts is the hardest exercise in self-mastery that you will ever engage in. See if you can talk and think about only what you desire and not talk or think about anything that you don't want for 24 hours. Then you'll see what you're really made of. It's a hard thing to do but with practice, you can reach the point where you are thinking about your goals and desires most of the time. Then, your whole life will change for the better.

Action Exercises
Here are two things you can do to build a belief system consistent with the financial success you desire:

First, continually repeat to yourself the words, pictures and thoughts consistent with your dreams and goals. Whatever you repeat often enough, over and over, becomes a new belief.

Second, set a goal for yourself to think and talk only about the things that you want for the next 24 hours. This will be one of the hardest things you ever do. But if you can keep your mind on what you want and off of what you don't want for 24 hours, you can begin to change your entire future.

Four Words That Make Life Worthwhile by Jim Rohn

2010-03-31T04:01:00.001-07:00

Over the years, as I’ve sought out ideas, principles and strategies to life’s challenges, I’ve come across four simple words that can make living worthwhile.

First, life is worthwhile if you LEARN. What you don’t know will hurt you. You have to have learning to exist, let alone succeed. Life is worthwhile if you learn from your own experiences—negative or positive.

We learn to do it right by first sometimes doing it wrong. We call that a positive negative. We also learn from other people’s experiences, both positive and negative. I’ve always said that it is too bad failures don’t give seminars. Obviously, we don’t want to pay them, so they aren’t usually touring around giving seminars. But that information would be very valuable. We would learn how someone who had it all, messed it up. Learning from other people’s experiences and mistakes is valuable information because we can learn what not to do without the pain of having tried and failed ourselves.

We learn by what we see, so pay attention. We learn by what we hear, so be a good listener. Now, I do suggest that you should be a selective listener. Don’t just let anybody dump into your mental factory. We learn from what we read, so learn from every source. Learn from lectures. Learn from songs. Learn from sermons. Learn from conversations with people who care. Always keep learning.

Second, life is worthwhile if you TRY. You can’t just learn. Now you have to try something to see if you can do it. Try to make a difference. Try to make some progress. Try to learn a new skill. Try to learn a new sport. It doesn’t mean you can do everything, but there are a lot of things you can do if you just try. Try your best. Give it every effort. Why not go all out?

Third, life is worthwhile if you STAY. You have to stay from spring until harvest. If you have signed up for the day or for the game or for the project, see it through. Sometimes calamity comes; then it is worth wrapping it up and that’s the end. But just don’t end in the middle. Maybe on the next project you pass, but on this one, if you signed up, see it through.

And lastly, life is worthwhile if you CARE. If you care at all, you will get some results. If you care enough, you can get incredible results. Care enough to make a difference. Care enough to turn somebody around. Care enough to start a new enterprise. Care enough to change it all. Care enough to be the highest producer. Care enough to set some records. Care enough to win.

Four powerful little words: learn, try, stay and care. What difference can you make in your life today by putting these words to work?

Double Your Earnings

2010-03-29T17:42:00.000-07:00

By: Brian Tracy

You probably have the ability to produce and ear n easily twice as much as you are producing and ear ning today.

Put Key Ideas Into Action
I have taught time management strategies to more than 100,000 people over the last few years and the successes these people have had have often been amaz ing. Many of them have doubled their output in as little as one or two days. One businessman in Philadelphia tripled his income and doubled the amount of time he spent with his family within twelve months. Another businessman from Montreal increased his income by 700% over a period of two years by disciplining himself to practice these principles every hour of every day.

Small Effects Yield Large Results
The good news is that even a small effort on your part to implement the very best of time management principles into your life will yield a tremendous return in increased productivity, performance and output. It is like stepping on the accelerator of your own life and moving yourself onto the fast track in your career.

Efficiency Starts At School
We usually learn how to work efficiently and effectively in our teenage years by doing our schoolwork and our homework in an excellent way and handing it in on time. If a young person does not learn how to work during their school years, he or she will have a tough time working when they actually take a paying job.

"Get Your Life in Balance--Learn the Secrets of Happiness"

There is a good chance that your work life is consuming you and preventing you from having a fulfilling personal life.

I will teach you the secrets you need to manage your time--and live a happy, balanced work and personal life. Click for more >>

Most People Are Poor Workers
According to the studies, fully 50% of adults could not work a full day if their life depended upon it. They cannot stay on task. They are continually diverted and distracted into idle socializing, personal phone calls, shooting the breeze, arriving late, leaving early and taking too much time for coffee breaks and lunches. Time wasting consumes their day. Then they wonder why they are not entrusted with increased responsibilities and offered greater pay.

Be Paid More And Pro moted Faster
The fact is that if you do an excellent job in a timely fashion, you cannot help but be paid more and pro moted faster. We live in the first great meritocracy in human history. In a meritocracy, you are paid and rewarded purely on the basis of the valuable contribution you make to the lives and work of others. There are no glass ceil ings and no barriers to advancement.

Action Exercises
Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.

First, select the most valuable and important assignment you have to do right now, resolve to complete it, and start on it immediately.

Second, resolve to "work all the time you work" once you get started. Aim for 100% productivity. This could change your life.

17 Best Practices of Top Performing Sales People

2010-03-25T17:54:00.001-07:00

Many people wonder what separates a top performing sales person from the rest of the pack. In most cases, it's because they apply a number of best practices in their daily routine. Here are 17 best practices of top performing sales people.

1. They set HIGH TARGETS and goals. Top performers don't wait for their manager to issue an annual or quarterly quota. They set their own goals which is usually more ambitious than the corporate targets.

2. They carefully PLAN their quarter, month and week, as well as their daily schedule. Too many sales people fly by the seat of their pants and only look at the day or week ahead instead of planning their month and quarter. Look at the big picture.

3. They set OBJECTIVES for every sales call. It is essential to know exactly what you want to accomplish before you make your call (face-to-face or telephone).

4. They ASK high-value questions that probe to the heart of the issue. Sounds simple but most sales people fail at this and ask weak, feeble questions. Top performers are comfortable asking tough questions that make their prospect think.

5. They LISTEN carefully to what their prospects & customers say. You can ask all the questions in the world but if you don't hear what people tell you won't be able to present the proper solution. Instead of waiting for your turn to speak listen to your customer.

6. They CLARIFY the issue when they are unclear what their prospect means. People often say things that are unclear and most sales people assume they know what their prospect means. Top performers take the time to fully understand by asking "What do you mean by that?" of "Can you clarify that for me?"

7. They WAIT TO PRESENT their product, service, solution or idea until they know exactly what their prospect's situation is. The majority of sales people jump too quickly into their 'sales pitch' but top performers are patient and wait for the right moment.

8. They begin every sales presentation with a brief RECAP of their understanding of the prospect's situation. Again, a simple concept but one that is greatly ignored by many sales people. A quick summary of your customers' situation give you the opportunity to ensure that your presentation addresses their key issues.

9. They know how to ADAPT their sales presentation if their prospect's situation has changed. Making changes on-the-fly is challenging but it is one way to stand out from your competition. Learn how to modify your presentation when customer's situation has changed from the time you initially met to the time you are delivering your presentation.

10. They know how to properly and effectively POSITION their product, service or solution. The vast majority of sales people fail miserably at this. They talk, talk, talk but usually end up talking about aspects of their product or solution that have little or no relevance to their customer's situation.

11. Their sales presentations FOCUS on the prospect. Most sales presentations focus on the seller's company, their product, or other trivial information that is of no interest to the customer.

12. They are PREPARED for potential objections. Top performers anticipate objections and plan their response before their sales call.

13. They always establish the NEXT STEPS. Decision makers are busier than ever which means they are more difficult to connect with. Avoid losing contact with a prospect by agreeing on the next steps after every sales call. Do this in face-to-face meetings and telephone calls.

14. They FOLLOW-UP after the initial call or meeting. Many a sale has been lost because the sales rep failed to follow up after the initial call. You cannot rely on your prospect or customer to call you; you need to take this initiative. Set this up during your call or meeting.

15. They PROSPECT continually to keep their pipeline full. It's not uncommon for sales reps to experience peaks and valleys in their sales. This is usually a result of failing to prospect for new business on a regular basis. Avoid the highs and lows and schedule time to prospect for new business every week.

16. They deal with the DECISION-MAKER whenever possible. Dealing with people who have little or no buying authority is a waste of time. However, many sales people fall into this trap because it is easier to connect with people other than the decision maker. And that may be true. However, in the long run, they end wasting their time because they don't close the deal.

17. They look for ways to KEEP IN TOUCH with their customers. A sale is not a one-time deal. However, you need to find ways to keep your name in your customer's mind to prevent a competitor from squeezing in. Top performers incorporate this into their schedule and make it a priority.

Incorporate these strategies into your routine and you will quickly become a top performing sales rep too.

© MMX Kelley Robertson, All rights reserved.

Kelley Robertson, author of The Secrets of Power Selling helps sales professionals close more sales with less effort. Kelley conducts workshops and speaks regularly at sales meetings and conferences. Receive a FREE copy of 100 Ways to Increase Your Sales by subscribing to his free newsletter at www.Fearless- Selling.ca.

How to Talk to Anybody, Anytime by Chris Widener

2010-03-25T17:49:00.000-07:00

You know the situation: There you are at a business or social function and you end up with someone who you have never met before. Some people get amazingly uncomfortable with this situation because they simply don’t know how to start or carry on a conversation. Yet successful people are always going to find themselves in these kinds of situations because they are always stretching themselves and putting themselves into situations to help them and their businesses grow, and that means meeting new people. So if you are going to be successful, one thing you have to get down is how to talk to anybody, anytime. Good news: It is easier than you think!

First, a couple of things not to do. One, don’t get flustered and excuse yourself. That is the easy way out, and you never know if you didn’t just leave who would have become your best friend or closest business associate. Stick around! Second, don’t start talking about yourself. Sure, introduce yourself, but don’t launch into a half-hour monologue about your accomplishments. The other person will either roll their eyes back into their head or simply give you a new nickname: Joe “let me tell you a story about myself” Schmoe. This leads me to the key.

Talk about the person you have just met. Don’t talk about yourself—talk about them! And the key is to ask questions. Now, there are obviously some people you just will not be able to talk to because they are absolute bores or they are angry or upset or something, but I have found that that is only about 1 percent of the people, if even that. For the most part, if you persist in asking questions, you will be able to talk to anybody, anytime.

There are three segments to this process:

Ask questions.
Find connections.
Go in those directions.

What you are trying to do is to find common ground. What makes people afraid to talk to others is that they are afraid they won’t have anything in common. I have found that usually, if you ask questions for a minute or two, you can always find a connection with someone, and then you’re set. The worst that could happen is that you ask the person questions for a few minutes and find nothing. But what will that person tell others? That you seem to have a genuine interest in others. That is a great reputation to have!

That is another key here. You can’t be a selfish, arrogant person and be successful. I am talking true well-rounded success, not just collecting a pot full of money.

The best way to describe this process is to write out a mock conversation. You will notice the kinds of questions I would ask, when I find a connection, and how I would go in that direction.

“Hi, I’m Chris Widener. What is your name?”

“Joe Schmoe.”

“Well, Joe, what do you do for a living?”

“I sell insurance.” (Possible connection here. Most people have insurance.)

“Oh, yeah? What kind of insurance?”

“I insure oil rigs in the Adriatic Sea.” (Whoops. Lost connection.)

“Wow. That must be fascinating. Married or kids, Joe?” (I have a wife and kids. Maybe we can show pictures.)

“No, actually, I’m single.” (It isn’t looking good yet.)

“So, who do you know here at the party?”

“Well, nobody. I am the brother of the host’s accountant. I’m in town for a week and my brother had to make an appearance.” (It is going in the wrong direction here.)

“So where are you from?”

“Nebraska.” (Bingo, there it is. The connection! Now let’s go in that direction.)

“Really? My dad was from Nebraska. Even though he died when I was 4, my grandmother used to take me back to visit my relatives every summer growing up. It sure was a lot of fun. Were you city folk, or did you live on a farm?”

“I grew up on a pig farm.”

“That’s what my relatives did! As a kid I always wanted to ride one of those sows. Luckily my uncles never let me attempt it.”

There you are. Now just start asking questions about what they did growing up, how they liked it, etc.

If you get adept enough at asking questions of others, you will inevitably find a connection to talk about. And having something in common with someone is the start to a long and mutually beneficial relationship—one of the foundations of success!

I am in a career where I meet new people all the time and this is exactly what I do. I am no better a conversationalist than most of you. It is just a proven way of getting a relationship off the ground with someone you have just met.

Here it is again: Ask questions, find connections, go in those directions.

How to Change the World

2010-03-23T19:17:00.000-07:00

Posted by: Darren Hardy in: SUCCESS

Since there was so much interest in the “Enough Already!” article, I wanted to extend the discussion by sharing something incredibly profound with you…

This article could change the life you experience forever. No joke.

I want to show you how to completely change the world… in an instant.

This might be a bit controversial for many, and even more won’t have the stomach to do what I am suggesting…

You can rid the world of all wars, crimes, scandals, gossip, corruption and international conflict.

You have that much power… in the palm of your hand.

Are you ready to change the world (if you dare)?

Hit the ‘OFF’ button.

Turn OFF your TV
Turn OFF your radio
Turn OFF your newspaper subscription

I’ve explained before (video: Media Madness) how watching media that aggregates the most brutal, shocking, heinous and scandalous events of the day can give you a perverted view of the world. Meanwhile millions of beautiful, miraculous,positive and wonderful things happen during the same day that don’t get any attention. It’s incredibly destructive to your spirit and creative potential.

Here is the controversial part…

Early on, I learned the difference between THE world and MY world. I only pay attention to MY world. After all it’s the only thing I can do anything about. Paying too much attention to the rest of it only makes me feel fearful, frustrated and cynical.

All I have in life is my attention. I have to make a choice of where I give it. That choice affects my experience of life and determines my potential for positive creativity. I can focus it on the worst of the world or the best. I can focus it on things I can’t do anything about or I can focus it on those things that I can and that have a direct on my life and my family.

So, until the war comes marching up my street, I’m not paying much attention to it. Until Al Qaeda knocks on my door and threatens my family, I’m not tracking their development. Until the earthquake is under my foundation or the tsunami rolls up my driveway, I’m not giving it my time. Murders, rapes, scandals, break-ins… I’m not interested.

I can hear you saying, “Ya, but…!” Let me address a few of them.

1. “Ya, but doesn’t that make you uninformed?”

Personally, I’d rather be informed about areas of life that matter more to my personal goals and ambitions. I can’t quantify how spending two hours on Chile’s earthquake disaster is going to help me grow my business, make me healthier or improve my relationships.

What about compassion for humanity you say? Yes, but there are plenty of other references even more immediate in my world that offers me plenty of that.

Oh, and yes, I’m a voting citizen. When it comes time to pay attention to the issues before the ballots are printed, I’ll do my homework. It will take me a couple of hours versus the months of constant scandal, mudslinging, corruption and distraction others will allow.

Let me show you an alternative option. A couple of years ago, a top executive hired me to mentor him on improving his productivity. He complained he didn’t have enough time for personal improvement study or for his family. When I dissected his day he spent 45 minutes in the morning reading the newspaper, another 35 minutes listening to news, both back and forth to work. During his workday, he’d check Yahoo! News several times, spending at least 20 minutes in total. When he got home, he’d catch the last 15 minutes of the local news while greeting his family. Then he’d catch up on 30 minutes of sports news and 30 minutes of the 10 o’clock news before going to bed. In total he was spending 3.5 hours with the news each day! I suggested he keep his TV and radio off, cancel his newspaper subscription, and set up an RSS feed so he could select and receive only the news he deemed important for his business and personal interests.

Doing so immediately cleared out 95 percent of the mind-cluttering and time-sucking noise and distraction. He could now review all that mattered to him in less than 20 minutes a day. This left the 45 minutes in the morning (his commute time), and that hour in the evening for productive activities: exercise, listening to instructional and inspirational material, reading, planning, preparing, and spending quality time with his family. He told me he never felt less stressed (constant negative news has a tendency to make you anxious), and more inspired and focused than he does now.

2. “Ya, but someone has to care about these issues.”

Yes, you are right, and I am glad others do. I call it picking our battles. Some pick the political battle, some the human rights battle, some the hunger battle, some the homeless battle, some the whales battle, etc. Pick what really matters to you, get involved with your whole heart and soul and stay focused on it. You take care of that issue for me and I’ll take care of this issue for you. That way we can actually get some things done. But instead, most people just corrupt their head with all of it and do nothing about any of it. How could you? It’s overwhelming and overly time consuming. Stick to what you care about, not what CNN does… every day.

3. “Ya, but my son is over fighting in Afghanistan.”

Bless him and bless you. As I mentioned above, pay attention to what is affecting your immediate family. If your immediate family is involved in some aspect of national news, then, of course, it’s worthy of your attention. It still doesn’t mean you need to bombard yourself with every aspect of the international war on terror. Instead pay attention to what is directly affecting your son and stay focused on him and his immediate world.

It all comes down to this—what you give your attention to becomes the reality of your world. Give your attention to scandals, murders, war, fear and brutality and that will program your creative computer and your world around you. Instead, focus your attention on what’s good, wonderful, abundant, wholesome and possible in the world. Focus your attention on ideas, information and knowledge that can help you grow, prosper, create and contribute to making a positive difference based on your unique talent, skills and effort. Turn OFF the rest… it will change your world and your life!

By the way, that is the type of information we work hard to collect for you in each issue of SUCCESS magazine (and in the enclosed CD in each issue), and what I labor to present to you here on this blog. I hope you benefit and enjoy!

Brian Tracy’s Seven C’s of Success

2010-03-23T19:11:00.000-07:00

After having studied top achievers and peak performers over the past 25 years, I’ve concluded that these unique men and women, have in most cases, mastered what I call the Seven C’s of Success.

1. Clarity—Eighty percent of success comes from being clear on who you are, what you believe in and what you want.

2. Competence—You can’t climb to the next rung on the ladder until you are excellent at what you do now.

3. Constraints—Eighty percent of all obstacles to success come from within. Find out what is constraining, in you or your company, and deal with it.

4. Concentration—The ability to focus on one thing single-mindedly and see it through until it’s done takes more character than anything else.

5. Creativity—Flood your life with ideas from many sources. Creativity needs to be exercised like a muscle; if you don’t use it you’ll lose it.

6. Courage—Most in demand and least in supply, courage is the willingness to do the things you know are right.

7. Continuous learning—Read, at the very least, one book a week on business to keep you miles ahead of the competition. And just as you eat and bathe, organize your time so you spend 30 minutes a day exploring e-mail, sending messages, going through Web sites, because like exercise, it’s the only way you can keep on top of technology. If you get away from it, you’ll lose your edge.

Three Rules for Turning Stress into Success by Denis Waitley

2010-03-23T19:05:00.000-07:00

1. Accept the Unchangeable—Everything that has happened in your life to this minute is unchangeable. It’s history. The greatest waste of energy is in looking back at missed opportunities, lamenting past events, grudge collecting, getting even, harboring ill will, and any vengeful thinking. Success is the only acceptable form of revenge. By forgiving your trespassers, you become free to concentrate on going forward with your life and succeeding in spite of your detractors. You will live a rewarding and fulfilling life.

Your enemies, on the other hand, will forever wonder how you went on to become so successful without them and in the shadow of their doubts.

Action Idea: Write down on a sheet of paper things that happened in the past that bother you. Now crumple the paper into a ball and throw it at the computer screen. This symbolizes letting go of past misfortunes.

2. Change the Changeable—What you can change is your reaction to what others say and do. And you can control your own thoughts and actions by dwelling on desired results instead of the penalties of failure. The only real control you have in life is that of your immediate thought and action. Since most of what we do is a reflex, subconscious habit, it is wise not to act on emotional impulse. In personal relations, it is better to wait a moment until reason has the opportunity to compete with your emotions.

Action Idea: Write down in your diary one thing you will do tomorrow to help you relax more during and after a stressful day.

3. Avoid the Unacceptable—Go out of your way to get out of the way of potentially dangerous behaviors and environments. When people tailgate you on the freeway, change lanes. If they follow you at night, drive to a well-lighted public place.

When there are loud, obnoxious people next to you at a restaurant or club, change tables, or locations. Also, be cautious of personal relationships developed via the Internet. With the massive number of individuals surfing the Net, the number of predators increases in proportion. Always be on the alert for potentially dangerous situations involving your health, personal safety, financial speculation and emotional relationships.

Action Idea: What is one unacceptable behavior you have or allow others to do to you that you will avoid, starting tomorrow? Example: The way you drive, being around negative people, walking down dark streets alone late at night, etc.

The Law of Persuasion

2010-03-18T00:41:00.000-07:00

By Brian Tracy

The purpose of the selling process is to convince customers that they will be better off with the product or service than they would be with the money necessary to buy the product. When you make sales presentations, you are asking customers to engage in a trade.

You are telling customers that if they give you their money, you will give them a product or service in return that will be of greater value to them than the money they pay. In addition, it will be of greater value than anything else that they could buy with the same amount of money at the same time.

Satisfied Needs
The customer always acts to satisfy the greatest number of unmet needs, in the very best way, at the lowest possible price. A major part of your job is to demonstrate that customers will get more of what they want, faster, by purchasing your product or service than they would get if they bought something else.

"Influence People and Get What You Want - Using Only Your Words"

It's a simple fact--the most successful people in the world are also the best communicators. Your ability to communicate with others will account for fully 85% of your success in your business and in your life. My CD will teach you how to persuade and influence others by speaking to them.
Click for more >>

Credibility
Proof that the other people similar to the customer have purchased the product builds credibility, lowers resistance, and increases sales. Every bit of information that you can present showing that other people, similar to the customer, have already wrestled with this buying decision, have decided to purchase, and have been happy as a result, moves you closer to making the sale.

One of the most powerful of all persuasion techniques in our society is called "social proof." We are all influenced by what others have done or are doing. We are much more open to buying a product or service when we know that other people like us have already bought it and are happy with it.

Testimonials
Testimonials of any kind increase desirability and lower price resistance to a product or service. Testimonial letters or photographs of happy customers using and enjoying your product or service, or lists of satisfied customers, are powerful influence factors in persuading a person to buy. You should persistently solicit testimonials from your customers.

Acquire them from every source possible and every way you possibly can. Testimonials can make your sales work much easier. You will find that almost all top salespeople use testimonials that praise and support the product or services they are selling and that are relevant to the customer they are selling to.

Action Exercise
Gather testimonials of every kind from every satisfied customer you possibly can. Build your sales presentation and your sales materials around these testimonials. Continually prove to your prospects that other people, just like them, are happily using what you sell.

Get a New Attitude by Chris Widener

2010-03-14T17:04:00.000-07:00

One of the first and foremost things to do to change your life is to change your attitude. Attitude is fundamental to the success or failure that we experience in our life.

Are you less successful than you would like to be? Do you have the money you want? Do you have the family you want? Do you have the job that you want?

If you answered “no” to any of the questions above, then you may want to take a look at your attitude, because so much depends on it!

“Life is 10 percent what you make it and 90 percent how you take it,” says Irving Berlin. It is true. Now don’t get me wrong, that 10 percent is M-A-J-O-R, but even bigger than that is what your attitude is. So, do everything that you can—action wise—to make your life an absolute success. But when you are done acting, you will only have what you have. It may be big and it may be little. But it is what you have to live with. Now the biggest key will be what your attitude is toward what your actions have brought to you. One person will work and be happy with it. Another will work, achieve the same thing, and have a terrible attitude about it. Who will achieve the most successful life? My bet is on the one with the best attitude.

Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “To different minds, the same world is a hell, and a heaven.” It is all in what value you give to it! You see, you may look at one thing and say “That’s terrible,” while another person may say, “That’s great!” A simple example would be a half a ham sandwich. Now, if you are used to filet mignon, you are going to think, “A measly old ham sandwich? Is that it?” But a starving person would have a very different viewpoint! They would think, “I won the lunch lottery!”

Another reason to keep in mind that our attitude is so very important is because oftentimes the attitude we demonstrate is exactly what we will get back. The great Earl Nightingale said, “Our attitude toward life determines life’s attitude toward us.” Think about it. You walk into a store and say to the clerk, “Hey lady, do you think you could get off your duff and tell me where I can find the milk?” What kind of attitude do you think you will get back? Instead, we should go in and say, “Excuse me, but would you be so kind as to tell me where I could find the milk?” You will get a good attitude back from that! The same is true in every area of our lives. Do you find that others have a bad attitude toward you? Then maybe you have a bad attitude toward them. The old saying is true that you reap what you sow; if you are reaping bad attitudes, you are probably sowing bad attitudes. Take a closer look, and you may find the key to turning your life around.

“There is little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference. That little difference is attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative.” —W. Clement Stone

Let’s face it; there is little difference in people physically or intellectually. But what does make the difference is the attitude. You can take two people of similar background, education, skill and intelligence and find that one is the kind of person you are looking for because of a positive attitude, while the other is a complete dud—the eternal pessimist! Your attitude is the big difference.

What is your attitude? Is it positive or negative? Are you an optimist or a pessimist? I guarantee you, no matter what your attitude is, it is affecting you—and your success. Take this test: Purposefully upgrade your attitude for 90 days and see if life doesn’t begin to change for you! Pick a few areas where you can make a change. For example, begin to trust people and believe the best in them and see if your relationships begin to change!

If you’re stuck or if you just want to go to the next level of success, it’s time to “Get a New Attitude!”

Attitude Is Everything by Jim Rohn

2010-03-14T17:03:00.000-07:00

The process of human change begins within us. We all have tremendous potential. We all desire good results from our efforts. Most of us are willing to work hard and to pay the price that success and happiness demand.

Each of us has the ability to put our unique human potential into action and to acquire a desired result. But the one thing that determines the level of our potential—that produces the intensity of our activity and predicts the quality of the result we receive—is our attitude.

Attitude determines how much of the future we are allowed to see. It decides the size of our dreams and influences our determination when we are faced with new challenges. No other person on earth has dominion over our attitude. People can affect our attitude by teaching us poor thinking habits or unintentionally misinforming us or providing us with negative sources of influence, but no one can control our attitude unless we voluntarily surrender that control.

No one else “makes us angry.” We make ourselves angry when we surrender control of our attitude. What someone else may have done is irrelevant. We choose, not they. They merely put our attitude to a test. If we select a volatile attitude by becoming hostile, angry, jealous or suspicious, then we have failed the test. If we condemn ourselves by believing that we are unworthy, then again, we have failed the test.

If we care at all about ourselves, then we must accept full responsibility for our own feelings. We must learn to guard against those feelings that have the capacity to lead our attitude down the wrong path and to strengthen those feelings that can lead us confidently into a better future.

If we want to receive the rewards the future holds in trust for us, then we must exercise the most important choice given to us as members of the human race by maintaining total dominion over our attitude. Our attitude is an asset, a treasure of great value, which must be protected accordingly. Beware of the vandals and thieves among us who would injure our positive attitude or seek to steal it away.

Having the right attitude is one of the basics that success requires. The combination of a sound personal philosophy and a positive attitude about ourselves and the world around us gives us an inner strength and a firm resolve that influences all the other areas of our existence.

Vision, Connection, & Direction: The Pathway to Effective Communication by John C. Maxwell

2010-03-11T17:47:00.001-08:00

By communicating a message of hope and significance to his oppressed countrymen in Poland, Pope John Paul II played a lead role in toppling communism in Europe. He affirmed the dignity and humanity of Poles, rallying them to resist communism, while at the same time teaching them to show restraint when confronting the communist authorities. The vision, connection, and direction he conveyed to people in his homeland as they struggled against a repressive regime altered the course of world history.

VISION

When Pope John Paul II spoke, the world listened. A powerful, personal vision gave force to his words. It was a vision birthed in tragedy and refined through years of patient suffering.

As a young man Karol Wojtyla experienced firsthand the horrors of Nazi Germany. As the Nazis swept into Poland, they shut down the university he was attending, executed several of its professors, and carted off many of his Jewish friends. Enduring the cruelties of the German occupation and witnessing the violations of his country fueled Wojtyla's passionate vision of the rights each human ought to have.

In World War II, the Soviet Union "liberated" Poland. In reality, one system of tyranny simply replaced the other. As a young priest and then bishop, Wojtyla learned how to operate under the watchful eye of a restrictive communist government. He carried out his duties within the church boldly yet shrewdly, expanding its influence without provoking official backlash from the government. The experiences shaped his vision, schooling him in the strategies that would later aid him in undermining communism as Pope.

CONNECTION

Pope John Paul II connected to people because he identified with their hopes, their troubles, and their fears. Journalist Neal Ascherton, who accompanied the Pope on his early visits to Poland, marveled at his ability to connect with the audience-even when crowds numbered in the hundreds of thousands. "Each person got the impression the Pope was really speaking to them, that he was exclusively available for them." John Paul II valued people, and since he understood them, he could offer a hopeful message that made them feel significant. His optimistic words stood in stark contrast to the bleak, unpromising future that communism seemed to have in store.

DIRECTION

Soviet-style communism relied upon propaganda, or officially sanctioned lies, to sustain itself. The government manipulated the public debate by controlling the media, and consequently, people were exposed to a steady diet of misinformation. Through time, it became confusing for them to distinguish between reality and fiction.

John Paul II gave the people of Eastern Europe a moral compass to guide them as they navigated life in a communist system. His ideals served as a reference point, helping them to distinguish between right and wrong, truth and farce. Thanks to his position as head of the Catholic Church, the Pope could freely voice ideas that were distasteful to the existing communist authorities without having to fear reprisal.

Even though he inspired people to seek freedom, John Paul II was very subtle in his criticisms of communism. He was careful not to provoke the crushing retaliation of the Soviet military by fomenting a violent revolution. Through the papacy, John Paul II modeled the strategy by which communism would be undone: persistence of belief coupled with patient, restrained resistance.

SUMMARY

To say that one man toppled communism in Europe would be an overstatement, but perhaps nobody contributed more to its demise than Pope John Paul II. His prowess as a communicator allowed him to attain enormous influence within the subjugated nations of the Eastern bloc. By voicing a compelling vision, connecting emotionally with people, and modeling the direction forward, he transformed the political institutions of Europe.

About

John C. Maxwell is an internationally respected leadership expert, speaker, and author who has sold more than 18 million books. Dr. Maxwell is the founder of EQUIP, a non-profit organization that has trained more than 5 million leaders in 126 countries worldwide. Each year he speaks to the leaders of diverse organizations, such as Fortune 500 companies, foreign governments, the National Football League, the United States Military Academy at West Point, and the United Nations. A New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and Business Week best-selling author, Maxwell has written three books that have sold more than a million copies: The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, Developing the Leader Within You, and The 21 Indispensable Qualities of a Leader. His blog can be read at www.JohnMaxwellOnLeadership.com.

Strategic Tune Up-Jim Meisenheimer

2010-03-11T16:20:00.001-08:00

Almost three months down and nine months to go. What will you do differently during the second half of 2010 to improve your selling results? If you don't take time to think about what you'll change, you may end up like stale bread.

Now that’s okay if you're happy with your year-to-date selling results. If however you'd like to do a lot better during the next 9 months you'd better think about making some changes today.

One of the keys to raising your personal bar is effective sales planning. For most of us selling is fun and planning is not. Remember that selling success doesn't come from doing what everyone else is doing.

The most successful salespeople do the things that few salespeople take an interest in doing. There are two requirements for planning.

First set aside some quiet time for creative thinking. Actions follow thoughts - that's why creative thinking is so important.

Second, be sure to put your thoughts on paper. It really does make a difference.

At least once a year professional salespeople should dedicate a minimum of one day to strategically think about their businesses. Don't be too quick to say you're already doing it.

Here’s a good way to begin your strategic sales planning process. Start with these six critical questions. Direct these questions at your business, your territory, your accounts, your customers, and naturally your competitors.

These questions will raise more questions and you should consider this process a success if you end up with more questions than answers.

Here are the six questions:

1. Where are you are now? Where are you now relative to your sales results and selling skills? How's your performance? What's your relative rank within your region and within your company?

What kind of overall growth do you have in your territory and in your top-10 accounts? Where are your competitors making inroads in your accounts? How well are you managing your time in your territory? What are your biggest challenges and best opportunities for growth?

Hey – you could spend an entire day just thinking about these questions.

2. Where are you headed if you don't change anything? What's the implication for you if you don't acquire new skills? What happens to your overall performance next year if you don't make up the loss for those accounts who decided to go to the competition?

How will your customers react to a strategy that is really based on a "more of the same" concept, especially when your competitors are becoming more creative in their approach?

With more work and less time available, how are you planning to manage the rest of the year when your business is expected to grow across the board?

If you couldn’t handle the challenges and opportunities last year, how will you respond to the one’s you face this year?

3. Where should you be headed? Do you have specific personal and professional goals? Are these goals specific and clearly defined? Are they in writing? Do you have completion dates established?

For each of your top-10 accounts do you have specific written objectives for sales, margins, growth rates, product mix, etc?

Have you made a commitment to self-development? What kind of sales books are you reading? Do you read the Wall Street Journal? If not, why not?

4. How will you achieve your objectives? You really can't "do" a goal or an objective. What you can and must do is create an action plan detailing how specifically you plan to achieve the goals you outlined when considering question three.

For example, if your goal is to increase your sales by 4.7% in your largest account, how specifically will you do it? How many “How’s” will it take to achieve your goal? Keep building your list of "How's" until it provides you with an 80% probability of success.

Remember your goals define (what you want to achieve) and your strategies define (how specifically you’ll do it.) Without proper linkage between goals and strategies, your goals begin to look like dreams – and could even turn into nightmares for you.

5. What are the specific details involved? The details referred to are the who, what, where, why, when, which, and how as they relate to initiating and implementing your strategies.

Ben Franklin once said, "Small leaks can sink big ships." In sales, minor adjustments can often create big impacts for you.

6. What should you measure? Are you measuring what matters most in your business? One of my favorite old sayings is "What gets measured gets done."

To keep you focused on your written objectives, how are you planning to measure your progress? What key elements of success should you review monthly?

Personal growth and development are often the result of careful measurement and evaluation.

The difference between first place and second place is often a very narrow margin. How many horses have won the Kentucky Derby by a nose?

These questions can make a significant contribution to your selling results, but only if you invest the time to ask them. The favorite day of the week for procrastinators is someday.

Action-oriented and results-oriented salespeople, the real doers in life, recognize, if you focus your energy on today, tomorrow takes care of itself.

Your future is yours to live one-day at a time. The shape of your future depends on how you live your days, one-day at a time.

Are you planning your future today or waiting for tomorrow to do it?

It's a clear choice and it's all yours.

Overcoming the Fear of Rejection by Dr. Denis Waitley

2010-03-09T15:46:00.001-08:00

To conquer your fear of rejection, you need to handle the word “no” in a constructive way. When people turn you down after a presentation, you have to interpret the “no” as “no, this is not right for me now.” We also can interpret “no” as meaning, “I need to know more about this opportunity or the products before I can say yes.”

I look at the service I offer to others as a gift that almost everyone desires. It’s like a nutritious dessert. What if waiters or waitresses in a restaurant said to customers at their tables: “Would you like our special strawberry parfait for dessert? It’s the best in the world!” And they were told “no” by their patrons, three out of five times.

Would they go to their manager, throw up their hands and quit, lamenting, “They don’t like me or my strawberry parfait”? Of course they wouldn’t. They’d go on about their business, thinking the patrons had missed out on something delicious.

That’s why I treat products as a gift, much more nutritious and beneficial than a fruit dessert. But what is being rejected is the presentation, not the presenter. When I can separate my self-esteem from offering the products or business opportunity, I can live with rejection and look for ways to get a positive response more often.

When you experience rejection, that’s the time to network with mentors and role models. It’s also the time to listen to upbeat music and read articles like this, to attend meetings and conference calls, and to hang around with optimists and winners.

There are basically four things we do in selling our products and services, and only four. We use the products and services ourselves, we talk to people about the products and services, we talk to people about the financial benefits we offer, and we coach them to refer us to others who do the same thing. First, we are coachable and willing to learn something new every day. Then, we become coaches. All you really need to move up to the next level is have faith in yourself.

To laugh is to risk appearing the fool. To weep is to risk appearing sentimental. To reach out for another is to risk involvement. To expose your feelings is to risk revealing your true self. To place your ideas and dreams before a crowd is to risk rejection. To love is to risk not being loved in return. To live is to risk dying. To hope is to risk despair. To try is to risk failure. But risks must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing at all. People who will risk nothing do nothing, have nothing, and become nothing. They may avoid suffering and sorrow, but they cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love or live. Chained by their certitudes, they are trapped.

They have forfeited their freedom. Only a person who risks is truly free. And one last idea you can live and believe: the more you give, the more you’ll receive.

Look on the Bright Side

2010-03-07T16:06:00.001-08:00

By Brian Tracy

The most important application of the law of cause and effect in your life is this: thoughts are causes, and conditions are effects. What this means is that your thought is creative. You create your world by the way you think. Nothing in your world has any meaning except for the meaning you give by how you think about it and talk about it. If you don't care about something, it has no effect on your emotions and actions.

How to be Happy
Many thousands of people have been interviewed over the years to find out what they think about most of the time. Can you guess what the most successful and happy people think about all day long? The answer is simple. Happy healthy people think about what they want, and how to get it, most of the time. When you think and talk about what you want, and how to get it, you feel happier and in greater control of your life.

How to be Unhappy
What do unhappy people think and talk about most of the time? Unfortunately, they think and talk about things they don't want. They think and talk about their problems and pains, and the people they don't like. Sometimes, their whole lives revolve around their complaints and criticisms. And the more they think and talk about what they don't want, the unhappier they become.

The Most Important Quality
Based on many psychological tests, the happiest people seem to have a special quality that enables them to live a better life than average. Can you guess what it is? It is the quality of optimism! The best news about optimism is that it is a learnable quality. You can learn to be a more positive, confident, and optimistic person by thinking the way optimists do—most of the time.

"Relax and allow affirmations to go through your subconscious mind!"

According to whole brain research, you can learn subjects quite rapidly as a result of deep relaxation and music used in a systemized, organized process. Because of this, it is also possible for you to learn new belief systems using the same techniques. Click for more >>

Look for the Good
Optimists seem to have different ways of dealing with the world that set them apart from the average. First, as we mentioned, they keep their minds on what they want, and keep looking for ways to get it. They are clear about their goals and they are confident that they will accomplish them, sooner or later. Second, optimists look for the good in every problem or difficulty. When things go wrong, as they often do, they say, "That's good!" and then set about finding something positive about the situation.

Seek the Valuable Lesson
The third quality of optimists is that they seek the valuable lesson in every setback or reversal. Rather than getting upset and blaming someone else for what has happened, they take control over their emotions by saying, "What can I learn from this experience?" Fully 95% of everything you do is determined by your habits, good or bad. When you repeatedly look for the good and seek the valuable lesson in every obstacle or disappointment, you very soon develop the habit of thinking like an optimist. As a result, you feel happier, healthier, and more in control of your world.

The Body-Mind Connection
More and more doctors are coming to the conclusion that 80% or more of all diseases and ailments are psychosomatic in origin. This means that "psycho," the mind, makes "soma," the body, sick. You do not get sick from what you are eating, but from what is eating you.

Action Exercise
Resolve from now on to see your glass of life half full rather than half empty. Give thanks for your many blessings in life rather than worrying or complaining about the things you do not have. Assume the best of intentions on the part of everyone around you.

Eliminate the Time Wasters in Selling

2010-03-02T16:56:00.001-08:00

By Brian Tracy

The first major time waster in selling is procrastination and delay. This occurs when you find every conceivable reason to put off getting there with people who can and will buy from you. Everyone procrastinates. There is always too much to do and too little time. The difference between successes and failures is determined by people's choices about what they put off. Losers put off the important things that could make a difference in their lives. Winners put off low-value tasks and activities.

Stop Wasting Time
According to Robert Half International, half of all working time, in all fields, is wasted. Most of this wasted time is taken up with coffee breaks, phone calls, and personal business, or other useless activities that make no contribution to your work.

Resolve to Overcome Procrastination
The best way to overcome procrastination is to plan each day in advance, set priorities on your activities, and then make your first sales call as early as you possibly can. Get up and get going. When you launch quickly into a workday, doing something important as early as possible, you will work at a higher level of effectiveness all day long.

The Incomplete Sales Call
Another major time waster is the incomplete sales call, requiring a callback. This occurs when you have not thoroughly prepared your presentation or taken all the materials you need for your sales call. When you are with the customer, you find you're missing the correct order forms, or other materials needed to close the sale. You then have to make arrangements to go back and see the prospect a second time, something that often does not happen.

Inaccuracies and Deficiencies
You waste a lot of time in selling when you find yourself with a prospect, but without all the information needed to make an intelligent presentation. You may have the wrong facts, the wrong figures, or the wrong specifications. You have misunderstood what the prospect said she wanted and made a proposal that does not solve the prospect's problem or satisfy her need.

Lack of Product Knowledge
This weakness can cost you hours of hard work. It boils down to ignorance of the product or service you are selling. This is invariably caused by laziness on the part of the salesperson. Fortunately it can be very easily overcome with time and study.

Poor Preparation
Thorough preparation separates the sheep from the goats among sales professionals. The top salesperson takes the time to diligently study every detail of her product or service. She reviews and then reviews again. She takes notes. She decides in advance that no one will ever ask her a question that she cannot answer intelligently and completely.

Unconfirmed Appointments
Here's a common scenario. A salesperson sets off across town to see a prospect for an appointment. It was arranged in advance, so everything should go as planned, right? But when the salesperson arrives, the prospect has been called out of town, is in a meeting, or cannot see him for some reason. As a result, he has wasted the entire trip, including the time it now takes him to get back to the office. Sometimes a salesperson can lose half a day because he did not reconfirm an appointment.

Action Exercise
Plan every day in advance; make a list of everything you have to do, and then set priorities on your list; always start with your number one, most important task.

Boost Your Productivity

2010-03-01T17:18:00.000-08:00

By: Brian Tracy

Push to the Top
All successful people are very productive. They work longer hours and they work better hours. They get a lot more done than the average person. They get paid more and promoted faster. They are highly respected and esteemed by everyone around them. They become leaders and role models. Inevitably, they rise to the top of their fields and to the top of their income ranges, and so can you.

Everything is Learnable
Every single one of these tested and proven strategies for managing your time and doubling your productivity is learnable through practice and repetition. Each of these methods will eventually become a habit of both thinking and working.

The Payoff is Remarkable
When you begin applying these techniques to your work and to your life, your self-esteem, self-confidence, self-respect and sense of personal pride will go up immediately. The pay off for you will be tremendous, for the rest of your life.

Make A Decision!
Every positive change in your life begins with a clear, unequivocal decision that you are going to either do something or stop doing something. Significant change starts when you decide to either get in or get out, either fish or cut bait.

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The Vital Quality of Success
Decisiveness is one of the most important qualities of successful and happy men and women, and decisiveness is developed through practice and repetition, over and over again until it becomes as natural to you as breathing in and breathing out.

Why People Are Poor
The sad fact is that people are poor because they have not yet decided to be rich. People are overweight and unfit because they have not yet decided to be thin and fit. People are inefficient time wasters because they haven't yet decided to be highly productive in everything they do.

Become An Expert
Decide today that you are going to become an expert in time management and personal productivity, no matter how long it takes or how much you invest in it. Resolve today that you are going to practice these principles, over and over again until they become second nature.

Action Exercises
Here are two steps you can take immediately to put these ideas into action.

First, hold your own feet to the fire. Resolve to start earlier, work harder and stay later. Don't let yourself off the hook.

Second, become an expert in time management. Learn and practice time management techniques every day until they become habits.

Decide Upon Your Major Definite Purpose

2010-02-28T16:00:00.001-08:00

By Brian Tracy

Since you become what you think about most of the time, a major definite purpose gives you a focus for every walking moment. As Peter Drucker said, "Whenever you find something getting done, you fine a monomaniac with a mission." The more you think about your major definite purpose and how to achieve it, the more you activate the Law of Attraction in your life. Helping you to attract people, opportunities, ideas, and resources to move more rapidly toward your goal and move your goal more rapidly toward you.

Activate Your Reticular Cortex
Each person has within his or her brain a special organ called the "reticular cortex." This small, finger-like part of the brain functions in a way similar to a telephone switchboard in a large office building. Just as all phone calls are received by the central switchboard and then rerouted to the appropriate recipient, all incoming information to your senses is routed through your reticular cortex to the relevant part of your brain or your awareness.

A Red Sports Car
Imagine that you decided that you wanted a red sports car. You write this down as a goal. You begin to think about and visualize a red sports car. This process sends the message to your reticular cortex that a red sports car is now important to you. A picture of a red sports car immediately goes up onto your mental radar screen. From that moment onward, you will start to notice red sports cars wherever you go. You will see them parked in driveways and in showrooms. Everywhere you go, your world will seem to be full of red sports cars.

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Achieve Financial Independence
If you decide to become financially independent, you will suddenly begin to notice all kinds of opportunities and possibilities around you that have to do with achieving your financial goals. You will see stories in newspapers and recognize books on the subject everywhere you go. It will seem as though you are surrounded by ideas and information that can be helpful to you in achieving your financial goals. On the other hand, if you do not give clear instructions to your reticular cortex and your subconscious mind, you will go through life as though you were driving in a fog.

Your Major Definite Purpose
Your major definite purpose can be defined as the one goal that is most important to you at the moment. It is usually the one goal that will help you to achieve more of your other goals than anything else you can accomplish. It must be something that you personally really want. It must be clear and specific. Your goal must be measurable and quantifiable. Your major definite purpose must be in harmony with your other goals. If you use your reticular cortex and keep your goal in your mind you are bound to achieve it.

Action Exercise
Determine how you will measure progress and success of achieving your goal. Write it down.

找出熱情堅持理想 - 劉揚銘

2010-02-28T07:33:00.001-08:00

一個西裝筆挺的上班族，每天總是最早上班、最晚下班；有時候工作到汗流浹背，體力好像永無止盡；碰到困難時，更是不達目的絕不停止；還有，他似乎無時無刻都在想著工作的事……或許你會說，這樣的人根本就是「工作狂」。但是，如果為這個無名的上班族，股神（Warren Buffett）、Amazon創辦人（Jeff Bezos）、日本樂天市場創辦人三木谷浩史的名字，或許你會願意稱他為「成功的工作狂」。

工作狂總給人較偏負面的觀感，然而就好像你會想要跟喜愛的人在一起、吃你喜歡的食物，有些人就是喜歡、甚至熱愛工作。喜愛工作，未必會成功；但是，絕大多數的成功者，都是選擇了自己想熱情投入的事，所以總是比其他人更認真、更有毅力，很自然地成為一個「自得其樂的工作狂」，就像孩子認真玩耍的時候，永遠不覺得累。

有趣！所以總想做更多、做更好

巴菲特曾說：「我每天踩著輕快的舞步進辦公室，始終沒變，因為這份工作實在太有趣了。」亞馬遜書店（Amazon）創辦人傑夫•貝佐斯（Jeff Bezos）曾在訪談中被問道：「你為何持續不斷地工作？」貝佐斯愣了一會兒，反問說：「你要不要問我為何想『繼續活下去』呢？」在他們耳中，「為什麼那麼愛工作」根本是個無法理解的問題，因為他們早已選擇了最有趣、最有意義的事，自然不可能停下腳步。反觀大部分的工作者，總想著在贏得某些獎勵後，就可以悠閒地坐在海灘上休息。

日本樂天市場創辦人三木谷浩史坦承自己一天24小時都在想公司的事：「雖然可能會被批評是工作狂，但我很明白，這是最快樂的生活方式。」熱愛自己所做的事非常重要。「只有愛己所為，才能比隔壁同事做得更多、更好，如果你辦不到，很抱歉，老闆會另請高明。」對工作有熱情的人，永遠能超越漫不經心的工作者。

行動！願景是找出來的

熱情、理想、願景、心中的無聲吶喊……不論你怎麼稱呼，擁有熱情，是所有成功者的共同特徵。然而，熱情不是憑空而來，是需要被「尋找發現」的。所以，成功者都會激勵自己不斷試探，以找出熱情。成功的領導人，通常是察覺到某些需求，當他們滿足了這些需求，又會看到另一個需求，最後他們意識到，應當將這些需求一般化，並找出制度化的手段，來維持自己的努力。

堅持！挫折也不會動搖目標

實踐理想的途中，挫折難免，但擁有熱情，便能在面臨逆境時有所堅持、面臨取捨時有勇氣決定，這也是成功者毅力的泉源。堅守正確的理念，是不可動搖的習慣。每個成功的故事背後，都有許多不確定因子。然而，找出自己有熱情的路、堅持自己的價值觀，並且忠於自己認為有意義的事物，絕對有助於在邁向成功的路上，不斷地激勵著自己。

The Winner's Circle by Dr. Denis Waitley

2010-02-24T17:48:00.001-08:00

Every four years we see those five brilliant, interlocking Olympic rings on flags and in television and billboard advertising globally. The Olympic Games are where the best in the world go for the gold and the few stand, listening to their national anthem, in the coveted winner’s circle. If the five Olympic rings were attitudes of champions in every profession, these five attitudes would be prominent in the mindset of the peak performer:

Paying the Price. Everyone wants to win, but few are willing to invest the time and effort. Paying the price means focusing on developing the skills and training regimen of champions—observation, imitation, repetition and the internalization of knowledge into habits; also, learning why and how to go the extra mile and seeing success as a marathon, not a dash. Champions view failures as temporary inconveniences and learning experiences.

The Olympian Within. Winners believe in their worth in advance of their performance. Most people base their worth on their current status or achievement level, which means that until they are judged successful by society’s standards, they have little to be proud of. Champions believe in their dreams when they have only a dream to hang on to, even in the face of criticism and superior achievements by others.

Non-situational Integrity. Authentic, lasting winners have an uncompromising attitude about self-honesty. They function according to an “integrity triangle,” consisting of three basic questions: (a) Are my beliefs based upon truth? (b) Do my words and actions correspond with truth and honesty? (c) Before I speak or act, do I honestly consider the impact of my decision on other people and the environment?

The “Coachability” Factor. Champions are always open to alternatives to improve their performance. Consistent winners are not the arrogant egotists who dominate the media spotlight. The most successful individuals in the game of life are often the most approachable, most gracious, least judgmental of others and most critical of their own performances, as well as most eager to learn and improve.

Being a Team Player. A team in harmony is synergy in motion, where the whole is greater than the sum of the individual talents. When all assignments are understood, when each takes 100 percent responsibility for the outcome, a quantum leap in performance takes place. Winners learn how to become interdependent—without sacrificing individuality—and how to stand out, while fitting in.

The Laws of Time Management

2010-02-22T17:58:00.001-08:00

By Brian Tracy

Everything you are today and everything you become in the future will be determined by the way you think and the way you use your time. Your attitude toward time is a critical factor in all you do and everything you accomplish.

The Law of Clarity
The clearer you are about your goals and objectives, the more efficient and effective you will be in achieving them. Clarity accounts for probably 80 percent of success and happiness. People with clear, written goals accomplish far more in a shorter period of time than people without them could ever imagine.

The Law of Priorities
Your ability to set clear and accurate priorities on your time determines the entire quality of your life. To achieve great things, you must always be concentrating on the small number of activities that contribute the greatest value to your life and your work.

The Law of Posteriorities
Before you start something new, you must discontinue something old. You can gain control of your life only to the degree to which you stop doing things that are no longer as valuable or as important to you as other thing you could be doing.

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The Law of the Most Valuable Asset
Your most valuable asset is your earning ability. Your ability to earn money is the most valuable asset you have. Your earning ability is a depreciating asset, like a car or a piece of equipment. You must continually maintain and upgrade the quality of your earning ability to keep yourself at the same high level of productivity, performance and output.

The Law of Planning
Every minute spent in planning saves ten minutes in execution. The purpose of "personal strategic planning" is for you to increase your "return energy," and return on the mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual capital you have invested in your life and career.

The Law of Rewards
Your rewards will always be determined by your results. You will always be paid in direct proportion to what you do, how well you do it, and the difficulty in replacing you. The fastest way to get paid more and promoted faster is for you to achieve a greater quality and quantity of results for your company and yourself.

The Law of Sequentiality
Time management enables you to control the sequence of events in your life. Your entire life today is the sum total result of the quality of your choices and decisions to this moment. If you are not happy with any part of your life, it is up to you to begin to make different choices and better decisions.

Action Exercise
Analyze the way you spend a typical day or a typical week. What are the things you need to do more of, sooner, in order to improve the quality and quantity of your output and results?

How Saying No Drives Great Careers - By Dan Coughlin

2010-02-22T17:55:00.001-08:00

Great organizations are defined by what they say no to. The same is true for great individual careers.

A great career is one where the individual made the type of contribution he or she believed was the optimal use of his or her talents, passions, and values and generated the types of desired outcomes that he or she wanted. In other words, the person generated both the desired input and output.

Manifesting such a career requires saying yes to a few key opportunities and saying no to a huge number of good, and possibly great, opportunities.

Dedicate Yourself to a Proposition

There have been literally hundreds and hundreds of books written about Abraham Lincoln. Why did he have such a memorable career? He dedicated his professional life, his career, to two propositions: "United we stand, and divided we fall" and "All men are created equal." These two propositions guided his career choices and his decisions within his various jobs. In the end, I think that's what made his career so successful: he remained committed to two very clear, important propositions.

Before reading on, take out a sheet of paper. Decide on the proposition that you are willing to dedicate yourself to. Write it down. You may end up rewriting it many times over the months to come. With a clear proposition in hand, you can then decide where to place your time and where not to place your time. Your proposition will help you to choose which roles you will want to fill and which roles you will not want to fill.

Choose Your Opportunity Costs Carefully

As you go about building a great career always take the time to clarify your opportunity costs, the things you are choosing not to have. If you choose to work as an employee, then you are choosing not to be an entrepreneur. If you choose to be an entrepreneur, you are choosing not to work for someone else. Both choices can be good, but you can't have both simultaneously.

Fifteen years ago I was considering starting my own business. I was a full-time, tenured teacher at a very well known high school in St. Louis. I wrote down my opportunity costs if I left, which included the following: really wonderful students would no longer just show up for me to teach, I would not have colleagues to bond with between classes or at lunchtime, I would not have a guaranteed paycheck every month or a guaranteed job for life, I would not have three months off in the summer time, and I would not have my curriculum to teach handed to me. To me that was a lot of opportunity costs to give up. Only once I became comfortable with what I was giving up was I able to go out on my own. However, once I left I didn't go back and try to teach at the high school while trying to run my own business.

I know people who did just the opposite. They were entrepreneurs and chose to teach or to work for someone else. They had considered their own opportunity costs of not running their own businesses and they chose to work inside an organization. My point here is you have to choose what you think is the best route for your career. I'm just encouraging you to step back and clarify what you will do and why you will do it and what you won't do and why you won't do it.

You have to choose your opportunity costs as much as, and maybe more than, your opportunities. As you consider your next career move, take out a sheet of paper and write down all the things you are not going to get as a result of going in the direction you are considering to take. Make sure you are comfortable with what you are giving up BEFORE you get comfortable with what you are going after.

The Choices of Charlie Rose

Charlie Rose is my favorite interviewer. The proposition that Charlie Rose has dedicated his career to is, "wanting viewers to feel like they were eavesdropping on a conversation each night -- fully engaged if not actually participating." He honed his craft over a number of years until he got the opportunity to do The Charlie Rose Show on PBS Television in 1991.

He had walked away from a well-paying program called Personalities in 1990 because he wanted to do a more serious talk show. He also said no to a full-time anchor slot on Sixty Minutes II in 1996 that would have earned him a great deal more than he makes on his own show on PBS. He turned it down because he felt doing his own show was, as he said, "the chance to find your own reality -- for yourself, not for others, what no man can ever know. In the end I have not finished the journey."

In saying no to a variety of opportunities, Charlie Rose defined who he was and who he wanted to become. He wants to do serious interviews with people on important topics without any pretense whatsoever. And he does it very well.

Actively Accept Limitations and Consequences

At some point, and I happen to think this is as good a time as any other, you have to get comfortable with the ideas of limitations and consequences. You can spend your whole life trying to be everything in the world and keep chasing one career dream after another. Or you can say, "I've chosen this path for my career. Here is the general path where I believe I can make my greatest contribution." And then be ok operating within the limitations and consequences of the career you have chosen. Actually, there's real power in deciding on the limitations you are going to accept. It means you are willing to get seriously focused at work that you have chosen to pursue.

In studying hundreds of really successful people, I've noticed that the best of the best stick with their chosen path. What's Steven Spielberg doing these days? He is still making movies. What's Oprah doing now that she's made billions? Still interviewing people to find out what they have to offer her audiences. What's Steve Jobs up to? He's working on guiding Apple to make electronic technology incredibly useful for consumers. What is Charlie Rose at the age of 67 doing tonight? He's interviewing one of the world's movers and shakers. Now that Bruce Springsteen has turned 60, what's he doing? Putting on great concerts. What's my mom doing today at the age of 80? She's still being a great stay-at-home mom as she has been for the past 54 years and caring for other people.

Be ok with who you are and who you are not. Stop wasting time always wanting to be someone else and always wanting a different career path. To manifest a great career you have to stick to the path of your own choosing, and not feel bad about all the paths you have chosen not to pursue. In reality, the more you consciously say no to alternative paths, the more sincerely you say yes to your life's work.

** To comment on this article or to read comments about this article, go here.

About the Author:

Visit Dan at http://www.thecoughlincompany.com. Dan is a student and teacher of practical processes that improve business performance. His purpose is to work with executives and managers so they achieve great performances. He is a business keynote speaker, management consultant, executive coach, and author of three books on management performance, including his newest, The Management 500: A High-Octane Formula for Business Success (AMACOM 2009), which has been endorsed by Jason Jennings, Marshall Goldsmith, and Brian Tracy.

Dan's clients include Coca-Cola, Abbott, Toyota, Prudential, Shell, Boeing, Marriott, McDonald's, Denny's, and the St. Louis Cardinals.

Catastrophe? Or Inconvenience? - By Monica A. Frank

2010-02-22T17:27:00.001-08:00

Listening to the weather forecast one frigid day, I realized how much we are influenced by the catastrophic thinking of the media. The weatherman reported, "The weather has brought more misery to the St. Louis area." Certainly, the weather was causing problems that day. An ice storm caused car doors and locks to be frozen so that people had a great deal of trouble getting into their cars. However, I thought, unless someone was in the middle of nowhere with no cell phone and they were unable to open their car door because of the ice, this was not "misery." Instead, I would call it an "inconvenience." Most of us walked out to our cars to find that we couldn't open the door, went back inside a warm house or office, and found some solution to our problem.

As a cognitive therapist I am well aware of the influence our thinking has upon moods and behavior. Yet, I became fascinated with how much we are inundated by negative messages that can seriously affect how we perceive a situation and how we feel. Many people may believe that I might be overstating the consequences of such a simple word as "misery." However, try a simple experiment for yourself. The next time it is raining, tell your colleagues or family "It's just miserable and dreary out" and watch their reactions. Do they tend to respond with a negative comment? Especially pay attention to their nonverbals: do they appear happy? Do they appear alert? Do they commiserate with a frown? Do their shoulders sag? Do they sigh? Then try telling others "I find listening to the sound of the rain so relaxing." Is there a difference in the nonverbals? Are they more likely to respond with pleasant conversation?

Such a simple and fairly insignificant example. Yet, if you find that people respond differently in these two conditions, imagine this response multiplied by all the daily influences in our lives: other people, television, internet, newspapers, radio. In fact, don't just imagine but pay attention to the words that are used by the media. Take a news article and highlight the emotionally influential words. Listen to a talk show and write down the times they make negative comments. How do you feel when you listen to a show with many negative words and comments? Do you feel more angry or burdened? Or do you feel refreshed or energized?

So why is this a serious problem? Because of the psychological concept "self-fulfilling prophecy." A self-fulfilling prophecy refers to a belief that creates an outcome. For example, if an individual is walking into a social gathering and thinks "I have so much trouble talking to people. I'm probably going to end up sitting by myself," he is likely to have exactly the outcome predicted. The negative thought and prediction causes the person to project certain nonverbal messages such as not smiling or lacking eye contact with others which tends to make him less approachable. In addition, he may be less likely to initiate contact because of the belief. And therefore, the prediction comes true and he sits in a corner by himself.

On the other hand, a self-fulfilling prophecy can also have a positive prediction. For example, let's say the person thinks "I have so much trouble talking to people. But I know I can introduce myself and smile and listen to others well. So I'll be able join a group and not sit by myself." This person is much more likely to have the positive outcome predicted.

Many years ago I treated a woman with severe Social Phobia. Terrified to be around others, she did her grocery shopping in the middle of the night and never interacted with others unless it was unavoidable. As she made progress in therapy, one day she reported excitedly "Someone asked me for directions at the mall." At first I was confused by this innocuous situation. However, she explained "Even when I was out in public in the past, no one ever approached me or smiled at me." Her previous self-fulfilling prophecy that no one could possibly like her had changed to the belief that she was a likeable person. As a result, her nonverbals had changed and other people could now approach her. This led to her being able to make friends, take classes, and get promoted to a supervisory position at work.

Therefore, my proposition is that the words we use can have quite an impact upon how we feel about a situation. If we look at a situation as an inconvenience rather than a catastrophe we will approach it differently and not feel as overwhelmed. One day a couple years ago just as I finished a session with my last client of the day in which we discussed this very topic and walked out to my car I noticed I had a flat tire. I said to myself, "This is an opportunity to practice what you preach. A flat tire is really just an inconvenience." However, I was supposed to teach a cardio kickboxing class that evening and I probably wasn't going to make it. So, I called AAA to fix my tire and another cardio teacher to handle my class continuing to remind myself that this is just an inconvenience. Prior to the truck from AAA arriving I received a call about someone I knew personally who was making suicidal threats and I needed to assist. Throughout all this I remained calm and handled both situations. Later, I recognized that by not responding as if it was a catastrophe that a friend was suicidal while my car was broke down, I was less stressed by the situation and was better able to assist.

Now, I'm certainly not saying that nothing is catastrophic. However, we need to be careful how many events we tend to classify in that category. I think in general we over-classify events as catastrophes. Most situations are not catastrophes and we need to keep perspective. For instance, one time when I was viewing things in my life more negatively, my husband looked up from the paper and said, "Here's an article about some folks in Ethiopia who were crossing the country on foot to get to another country for food and they were eaten by lions." That immediately put things in perspective for me because that was a true catastrophe.

A client I had who was dying of cancer once said to me, "If a problem can be solved by throwing money at it, it's not really a problem." She meant that even if you didn't have the money, it was still a solvable problem. Whereas, it didn't matter how much money she threw at the cancer, it was unsolvable. She was going to die no matter what.

Yet, in a philosophical sense, we could take this premise even further and question whether death is even a catastrophe. Suffering and death are normal parts of life just as joy and happiness are. I'm not saying we should embrace suffering and look forward to death, but I am saying that we can choose to focus on the joy and happiness in life by not making inconveniences into catastrophes.

Copyright © 2009 by http://www.excelatlife.com.

** To comment on this article or to read comments about this article, go here.

About the Author:

Dr. Monica A. Frank is a clinical psychologist specializing in the cognitive-behavioral treatment of anxiety and stress-related disorders including OCD, Panic Disorder, Social Phobia, and PTSD. In addition, she furthered her education in Sport and Exercise Psychology with a focus in performance enhancement after obtaining her black belt in Kenpo Karate. She has a private practice in St. Louis, MO and can be contacted at 314-843-0080. Also, she teaches cardio-kickboxing and tai chi at the Martial Arts Center (http://www.kenpousa.com). Additional articles can be found at http://www.excelatlife.com.

Napoleon's Key to Victory

2010-02-21T19:47:00.001-08:00

By: Brian Tracy

The only real measure of business leadership is results. This requires the ability to act boldly with no guarantees of success. The greatest obstacle to overcome is fear of the unknown.

The Key to Confidence
Most fear however, is rooted in ignorance. The more knowledge or skill you have in any area, the less fear it holds. Napoleon Bonaparte is considered by historians to be perhaps the greatest single military leader who ever lived. More than 100,000 books have been written about him since his death on St. Helena.

Pay Attention to Detail
Napoleon's courage was legendary but it was not vain or impetuous. Napoleon was famous for his fastidious attention to detail, for taking pains to study and thoroughly understand every military situation he ever faced. He led the French army in hundreds of minor and major engagements and lost only three, the last one being Waterloo. The more you know about what you face, the lower your level of ignorance, the more courage and confidence you will have naturally. The more time you take to think through a situation, the more capable you will be of dealing with it when it arises. Napoleon planned for every contingency.

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Think About the Possibilities
He carefully considered and followed through to its natural conclusion every setback or possibility of defeat he might encounter and then he prepared against it. To be caught unprepared for unexpected setbacks is a mark of weak leadership. Confidence comes from the constructive use of pessimism, thinking about what could go wrong long before it does.

Action Exercises
Here are two ways you can apply Napoleon's strategy to your situation.

First, become an expert in your field. Never stop learning and growing. The more you know, the more confidence you will have.

Second, get the facts. Double check everything. Be prepared for unexpected setbacks and reversals. The more prepared you are, the more confidence you will have.

Finding Opportunities in Any Economy

2010-02-18T16:48:00.001-08:00

by Jack Canfield

Your own beliefs and behaviors are great predictors of your success than any fluctuation in the marketplace. Even when the newspapers splash the word recession across the front page, you can write your own success story.

Master the Art of “Inverse Paranoia”

Start by becoming an “Inverse Paranoid”. What I mean by this is, believe that every event in your life is the seed for your greater good; something meant to enrich you, empower you or advance your cause.

Imagine how much easier it would be to succeed in life if you were constantly expecting the world to support you and bring you opportunity.

You can easily verify this belief for yourself. Just think about the last time that a terrible event turned out to be a blessing in disguise.

A big blessing for me came during the 1970’s when I lost my job. I was working at the Job Corps Center in Clinton, Iowa, pioneering new ways to teach underachieving students. One day the word came down that the center was being relocated – and I was being laid off.

While attending a workshop at the W. Clement & Jesse V. Stone Foundation in Chicago, I shared my predicament with the presenter. He happened to be vice president of the foundation, and he immediately offered me a job working with inner-city black and Latino kids.

I accepted the offer, and what I got in return was a bigger salary, an unlimited budget, and a laboratory for learning the success principles that transformed my life and launched a new career path.

Ask Yourself: What Opportunity Exists Here?

Take the fast track to inspiration by constantly asking yourself: What’s the opportunity here? Make this a habit, and you’ll stay calm and centered during any event that seems like a setback.

The beauty of this question is that it triggers your mind to respond with positive suggestions. Compare these to the useless information you get by asking yourself the questions such as: Why did this happen to me? Or, Who’s to blame for this mess?

If you get passed over for a promotion or your retirement account takes a hit in the stock market, remember to ask: What’s the opportunity here? – or one of its inspiring variations:

What can I learn from this event?
What will I do differently from now on?
Who can I turn to as a mentor or coach?
What’s my next action?

Remember the Three Things You Control

In a way, the economy is just a vague and sometimes ambiguous idea. It refers in a general way to trillions of dollars of goods, services and products by billions of people across the planet. When you face a financial challenge, it is the vast, impersonal economy at work? Or is it your personal economy, which you can directly control?

You can’t always count on the economy, but you can always rely on yourself.

Remember, you have absolute control over three things in your life:

The thoughts you think
The images your visualize
The actions you take (including what you say to others)

Your life experience is simply the sum total of the choices you make in these three areas. And you can attract new results at any time by making new choices. Use the ideas and exercise found in this article to do just that!

A Special Kind of Courage

2010-02-16T16:41:00.001-08:00

By: Brian Tracy

There are several different aspects of courage. Perhaps the most important is the courage to endure, to persist, to "hang in there" in the face of doubt, uncertainty and criticism from others.

Practice Patience in Adversity
This is called "courageous patience," the willingness and the ability to "stay the course" in the face of uncertainty, doubt and often criticism from many quarters.

Stay the Course
In my experience, there is a critical time period between the launching of a new venture and the results that come from that venture. During this hiatus, this waiting period, many people lose their nerve. They cannot stand the suspense of not knowing, of possible failure. They break and run in battle, they quake and quit in business.

The True Leader
But the true leader is the person who can stand firm, who refuses to consider the possibility of failure. The turning points of many key moments in human history have been the resolution, or lack thereof, of one person. Courageous patience is the acid test of leadership.

To encourage others, to instill confidence in them, to help them to perform at their best requires first of all that you lead by example.

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Allow Honest Mistakes
The second thing you can do to help alleviate the fears of failure and rejection in others is to encourage them to take calculated risks and allow honest mistakes.

Build People Up
Give the people who look up to you regular praise and approval. Celebrate good tries as well as success, large and small. Create a psychological climate where people feel safe from censure, blame or criticism of any kind. Then do things that make people feel terrific about themselves.

Become Unstoppable
Courage comes from acting courageously on a day-to-day basis. Your personal development goal should be to practice the behaviors of a totally fearless person until you become, in your own mind, unstoppable.

Action Exercises
Here are two ways for you to develop courageous patience.

First, prepare yourself in advance for the inevitable disappointments and setbacks you will experience on the way to your goal. Don't be surprised when they occur.

Second, resolve in advance that you will bounce rather than break and continually encourage others to think and act the same way.

Eat for Health and High Energy

2010-02-16T16:39:00.001-08:00

By Brian Tracy

The first rule for great health is that you should eat the right foods, and you should eat fewer of them. Your body is very much like a complex production process, and every bite you eat has a chemical effect on your health and well being. By eating excellent foods, and in the right proportions, you can dramatically increase the quality and length of your life.

The Keys to Greater Longevity
Fortunately, we know almost everything we need to know about the proper diet. The eating habits of the Hunza Tribe in Southern Russia, people live to be 110 to 120 years old. People who have been put on the Hunza diet in downtown London, England, have begun to almost immediately experience the same levels of health, energy and longevity as the Hunzas in the mountains of Russia.

Variety is Essential
The very best diet for high levels of fitness and long life consist of lean source proteins, fruits, vegetables and whole grain products, and lots of water. The diets they studied were extremely varied, and the sources of these foods came from many different areas, but they all contained very much the same ingredients.

Two Foods to Avoid
The two foodstuffs that seem to be associated with the most health problems are fats and carbohydrates. In moderation, they are a regular part of a normal diet. But in excess, they cause poor health, weight gain and obesity. Eating too many fats and carbohydrates decreases energy and causes a variety of physical ailments, including diabetes, heart attacks and strokes.

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The Real Reason for Obesity
People who eat too many carbohydrates develop two common conditions. In men, they develop carbohydrate belly, of the huge stomach you see on men who eat too much of the wrong foods. On women, they develop carbohydrate thighs, or what some people call cellulite, which is another word for fat. In America today, fully 50 million people are officially characterized as obese. This means that they are 20% or more above their ideal bodily weight, according to height and weight charts. And the primary reason for obesity is too many fats and carbohydrates, and too few lean source proteins, fruits, vegetables and whole grain products.

The Three White Poisons
To be really healthy, and live a long happy life, you need to eliminate what I call the three white poisons as well. These three white poisons are salt, sugar and white flour products. Each of them is bad for you and none of them is necessary for optimal health.

You are Sweet Enough
Recent research says that sugar is the main culprit in weight gain and poor health. Sugar products make you fat, tire you out, rot your teeth, ruin your appetite for nutritious foods and shorten life. And the fact is that you actually require no sugar at all in your diet.

Eat to Live
The rule for long life is that you should eat to live rather than live to eat. The best health rule for health, fitness, and high levels of energy can be summarized in five words: "Eat less and exercise most."

Action Exercise
Write down everything you eat for a week, look at what you are eating and how much. You will probably be shocked to see everything you put in your body, and how a lot of the food is carbohydrates, sugar, and processed food.

How to Handle Any Objection

2010-02-16T16:30:00.001-08:00

By Brian Tracy

There are no sales without objections. Objections indicate interest. Objections are signposts that lead you step-by-step toward closing the sale. The fact is, if there are no objections, there is no interest. If there is no interest, there will be no sale.

Use a Testimonial
As you already know, one of the most powerful ways to eliminate objections is to present testimonial letters from satisfied customers who shared the objection at one time. A sweetheart letter answering a customer's major concern is a potent way to demolish the objection forever.

Interpret It as a Question
Aside from using testimonials, another way to deal with objections is for you to take the objection and interpret it as a question. Treat it as a request for more information. Recognize that an objection is a natural customer response to any offering where there is some risk of purchasing. When the prospect says, "It costs too much," you can respond by saying. "That's a good question. Why does it cost more than you're expected to pay?" You then go on to answer the question you have posed.

Give a Good Reason
Another way to deal with an objection is to treat it as if the customer is asking you for a reason to eliminate the objection. If the customer says, "I can't afford it," you can imagine that the customer is really saying, "Show me how I can justify spending this amount of money."

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Make It Easy to Object
Above all, make it easy to object. Most customers do not want to get into an argument or a debate with you over your product or service. They will be reluctant to object for feat that you will become upset or adamant. For this reason you must make it easy for the customer to object by responding in a cheerful, friendly, constructive way when he does.

Listen Carefully
When you get an objection, hear it out completely. Don't assume that you know what the prospect is going to say. Often the prospect will begin with an objection you've heard before, but then will add her own particular concern or problem at the end. Be patient. Practice your listening skills. Pause before replying. Question for clarification.

Objection Versus Condition
Determine whether the customer's response is an objection or a condition. An objection is something that you can answer. It is a problem for which there is a solution. It is an obstacle than can be removed on the way to making the sale. A condition, however, is a genuine reason for not going ahead. If a person has no money, this is a condition that renders buying impossible.

Welcome Objections
Objections are a standard and predictable part of any sales conversation. We've all had previous experiences with products and services that were disappointing. We do not want to have those experiences again. Your job is to be patient, polite, and positive, asking good questions and listening intently to the answers. If you are courteous and persistent, eventually the prospect will tell you why he might be hesitating and give you an opportunity to answer his question and close the sale.

Action Exercise
Determine the one thing that a prospect might be convinced of to go ahead and buy your product or service, concentrate on finding and proving that he will get this key benefit.

Connectors Keep It SimpleBy John C. Maxwell

2010-02-11T17:06:00.000-08:00

William Henry Harrison gave the longest inaugural address of any U.S. President, taking two hours to plod through a whopping 8,445-word speech. Even though the speech was delivered outdoors on a frigid and rainy day, the President stubbornly refused to wear an overcoat or hat. As a result, he caught a cold that developed into pneumonia, and he died a month later. The leadership lesson: it pays to simplify.

Two Myths about Simplicity

Myth #1 Simplicity Lacks Depth

A few years ago, I was being interviewed on a television talk show. "John," the host said, "I've read several of your books, and they are all so simple." His mocking tone made it clear to the audience and to me that the comment was not intended as a compliment.

My response was direct: "That's true. The principles in my books are simple to understand, but they are not always simple to apply." The audience applauded, and the talk show host conceded that what I said was true.

We often associate simplicity with a lack of depth or shortage of intelligence. Conversely, we ascribe intelligence to people who communicate using big words or hard-to-grasp concepts. Somehow, we assume that anyone speaking in a dense, academic style must be smart.

The issues we face in life can be complex, with all sorts of intricacies. However, as leaders and communicators, our job is to bring clarity to a subject, reducing rather than adding to its complexity. The measure of a great teacher isn't what he knows; it's what his students know. Simplicity is a skill, and it's a necessary one if you want to connect with people when you communicate.

Myth #2 Simplicity Is Easy

When we encounter something simple, we assume it has been hastily thrown together or not fully thought out. To us, simplicity means taking shortcuts and denying the complex reality of life. However, in a society flooded with information, simplicity has never been more difficult to achieve. Nor has it ever been as important.

Perhaps nobody understands simplicity better than Apple, Inc. The company put its computers back on the map by touting their user-friendly interfaces. Then, Apple leapfrogged the competition by pioneering devices that simplified the way we access, store, and share information.

Despite his success in bringing about simplicity, Apple CEO Steve Jobs attests to the difficulty of doing so.

If you read the Apple's first brochure, the headline was "Simplicity is the Ultimate Sophistication." What we meant by that was that when you first attack a problem it seems really simple because you don't understand it. Then when you start to really understand it, you come up with these very complicated solutions because it's really hairy. Most people stop there. But a few people keep burning the midnight oil and finally understand the underlying principles of the problem and come up with an elegantly simple solution for it. But very few people go the distance to get there.

A leader's initial attempts to resolve a problem raise a host of questions that make the problem appear bigger than it did at first. However, as leaders persevere through the haze of complexity and wade through the maze of possible remedies, they often arrive at a simple solution. Once they have the solution, and can state it plainly, leaders are in position to connect with their customers.

Summary

It may seem counterintuitive, but if you want to take your communication to the next level, don't try to dazzle people with your intellect or overpower them with information. Give them clarity and simplicity. People will relate to you, and they'll want to invite you back to communicate with them again.

Also, don't expect simplicity to come easily. At first, your attempts to find clarity may seem to backfire. Nevertheless, press on and maintain focus. Eventually, you'll reduce your problems to a manageable size, and you'll uncover simple principles that will aid your ability to connect with those you serve.

About

Making the Most of Today by Denis Waitley

2010-02-11T17:04:00.000-08:00

What each of us is doing this minute is the most important event in history for us. We have decided to invest our resources in THIS opportunity rather than in any other.

It is helpful to remember this when we consider the passage of time. As the years pass, I am acutely aware that the bird of time is on the wing. At my high school reunion, I saw people who claimed to be my former classmates. We all had big name tags printed in capital letters so we wouldn't have to squint with our reading glasses on trying to associate the name with each well-traveled face. It was only yesterday that I was really enjoying high school. What had happened to the four decades in between? Where had they flown?

To the side of the bandstand, where the big-band sound of the late 1940s and 50s blared our favorite top-ten hits, there was a poster with a printed verse for all of us to see. I read the words aloud:

"There are two days in every week about which we should not worry, two days which should be kept free from fear and apprehension.

"One of these days is YESTERDAY, with its mistakes and cares, its faults and blunders, its aches and pains. Yesterday has passed forever beyond our control. All the money in the world cannot bring back yesterday. We cannot undo a single act we performed or erase a single word we said. Yesterday is gone.

"The other day we should not worry about is TOMORROW, with its possible adversities, its burdens, its large promise, and its poor performance. Tomorrow is also beyond our immediate control.

"This leaves only one day, TODAY. Anyone can fight the battles of just one day. It is only when you and I add the burdens of those two awful eternities - Yesterday and Tomorrow - that we break down.

"It is not the experience of Today that drives us mad, it is remorse and bitterness for something which happened yesterday and the dread of what tomorrow may bring. Let us therefore… Live this one full TODAY."

Malcolm Forbes believed the important thing is "never say die until you're dead," and he lived that example to the hilt. It is, as we realize when we suddenly attend our high school reunion, a short journey.

But it is difficult to be depressed and active at the same time. So get active! Live TODAY.

Practice the ABC Method

2010-02-11T16:33:00.001-08:00

By: Brian Tracy

"The first law of success is concentration - to bend all the energies to one point, and to go directly to that point, looking neither to the right or to the left." --William Mathews

The more thought you invest in planning and setting priorities before you begin, the more important things you will do and the faster you will get them done once you get started.

The more important and valuable the task is to you, the more you will be motivated to overcome procrastination and launch yourself into the job.

A Simple and Powerful Technique
The ABC Method is a powerful priority setting technique that you can use every single day. This technique is so simple and effective that it can, all by itself, make you one of the most efficient and effective people in your field.

The power of this technique lies in its simplicity. Here's how it works: You start with a list of everything you have to do for the coming day. Think on paper. You then place an A, B, or C before each item on your list before you begin the first task.

Determine Your Top Priorities
An "A" item is defined as something that is very important. This is something that you must do. This is a task for which there can be serious consequences if you do it or fail to do it, like visiting a key customer or finishing a report for your boss that she needs for an upcoming board meeting. These are the frogs of your life.

If you have more than one "A" task, you prioritize these tasks by writing A-1, A-2, A-3, and so on in front of each item. Your A-1 task is your biggest, ugliest frog of all.

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Decide on Your Secondary Tasks
A "B" item is defined as a task that you should do. But it only has mild consequences. These are the tadpoles of your work life. This means that someone may be unhappy or inconvenienced if you don't do it, but it is nowhere as important as an "A" task. Returning an unimportant telephone message or reviewing your email would be a "B" task. The rule is that you should never do a "B" task when there is an "A" task left undone. You should never be distracted by a tadpole when there is a big frog sitting there waiting to be eaten.

Analyze the Consequences of Doing It
A "C" task is defined as something that would be nice to do, but for which there are no consequences at all, whether you do it or not. "C" tasks include phoning a friend, having coffee or lunch with a coworker or completing some personal business during work hours. This sort of activity has no affect at all on your work life.

After you have applied the ABC Method to your list, you will now be completely organized and ready to get more important things done faster.

Start on Your A-1 Task
The key to making this ABC Method work is for you to now discipline yourself to start immediately on your "A-1" task and then stay at it until it is complete. Use your willpower to get going and stay going on this one job, the most important single task you could possibly be doing. Eat the whole frog and don't stop until its finished completely.

Your ability to think through, analyze your work list and determine your "A-1" task is the springboard to higher levels of accomplishment, and greater self-esteem, self-respect and personal pride.

When you develop the habit of concentrating on your "A-1," most important activity, you will start getting more done than any two or three people around you.

Action Exercises
Review you work list right now and put an A, B, or C next to each task or activity. Select your A-1 job or project and begin on it immediately. Discipline yourself to do nothing else until this one job is complete.

Practice this ABC Method every day and on every work or project list, before you begin work, for the next month. By that time, you will have developed the habit of setting and working on your highest priority tasks and your future will be assured!

The Keys to Personal Power

2010-02-11T16:28:00.000-08:00

By Brian Tracy

Everyone wants to be popular with others. You want to be liked and respected among your friends, family, and associates. Above all, you want to like and respect yourself, and to feel yourself to be a valuable and important person. Fortunately, everything you do that makes other people feel good about themselves makes you feel good about yourself as well. You can actually improve the way you feel by making other people feel important. This is the key to great personal relationships.

The Easiest Way
The first need that each person has is for acceptance. Whenever you express unconditional acceptance of another person, his or her self-esteem goes up. The person feels valuable and important as a unique and special individual.

An Attitude of Gratitude
The need for appreciation is a deep subconscious desire of every person you meet. When you satisfy this need, you will become one of the most popular people in your world. And what is the key to expressing gratitude and appreciation? Simple. Just say, "thank you" on every occasion.

The Deepest Craving of All
Perhaps the deepest emotional need that people have is the desire for praise and approval. Each person is deeply affected by the quality and quantity of approval they get from others, especially others who they respect very much.

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Looking Good
Another way to build self-esteem in others, and to make them feel important, is to express admiration on every occasion. Make it a policy to admire people for their accomplishments, behaviors, possessions, and personality traits.

Practice "White Magic"
This means practice listening closely to others when they are talking. It is one of the most powerful self-esteem building behaviors of all. Whenever you listen attentively to another, their heart rate speeds up. They feel happier and more valuable. They like and respect you more as a result. The more you listen closely to another person, the more that person feels that you are important and valuable as well.

Four Keys to Listening
The keys to effective listening are simple. First, listen attentively, without interrupting. Second, pause before replying. Don't rush in with whatever is on your mind. Third, questions for clarification by asking, "how do you mean?" Finally, feed it back in your own words.

The Great Design
As Aristotle said, "Man is a social animal." We live our lives within the context of our relationships with others. The more and better relationships we have, the happier and busier we are. The more you stay involved with other people, the longer you will live and the more enjoyable will be those years.

Action Exercise
Pick out the person that you like the least that you deal with on a day to day basis. Next time you see that person admire something about them. You can comment on their dress, grooming, work or even their possessions. You will be surprised how differently that person will react to you in the future.

Five Steps to Personal Power

2010-02-07T17:58:00.001-08:00

By Brian Tracy

There is a five-step power process that you can use to keep yourself positive and to achieve your goals faster. This five-step process brings together several of the very best techniques ever discovered for permanent mind change. It contains and illustrates all of the key principles that you need to know to become a highly effective, positive "possibility thinker" in your own life.

Imagine Your Perfect Future
Perhaps the biggest obstacle to creating a wonderful life is "self-limiting beliefs." Everyone has them, and some people have so may of them that they are almost paralyzed when it comes to taking action. A self-limiting belief is an idea you have that you are limited in some way, in terms of time, talent, intelligence, money, ability, or opportunity. The way you free yourself from these negative brakes on your potential is to change your thinking about who you are and what is truly possible for you.

Show Me the Money
Start with your income. How much do you want to be earning, one, two, three, and five years from today? Look around you and ask, "Who else is earning the kind of money I want to earn, and what are they doing differently from me?" If you don't know or you aren't sure, go and ask them. Do your homework.

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Design Your Perfect Life
Imagine your perfect lifestyle. If you had no limitations at all, how would you like to live, day in and day out? If you were financially independent, what kind of home would you live in? What kind of car would you want to drive? What kind of life would you like to provide for your family? What sort of activities would you like to engage in throughout the week, month, and year?

Turn Your Ideal into Reality
When you sit down and design your ideal lifestyle, you can then compare it to what you are doing today and notice the differences. You can then start thinking about how you could bring your real or current lifestyle closer to your ideal. When you idealize your income and your lifestyle, you develop vision for your life. You begin to practice a key quality of personal leadership. You begin projecting into the future and making plans to turn your future dreams into a current reality.

The Person you Become
Create an ideal future self in terms of your personal and professional development. What kind of person do you want to be in the future? What additional knowledge and skills do you want to acquire? In what areas would you like to become absolutely excellent? What subjects would you like to master? What do you need to learn to move up in your field? What is your growth plan to get from where you are to where you want to go?

Action Exercise
Look for something good in every problem or difficulty. Practice being an inverse paranoid, convinced that there is a vast conspiracy to make you successful.

Getting Clear on Your Passions - By Bob Doyle

2010-02-01T16:59:00.000-08:00

Passion - and knowing what yours is - is a big topic of conversation these days.

Since the Law of Attraction has come to more of a forefront in the past few years, and people are learning that they can create whatever kind of life they want, they are asking themselves, "Ok, what DO I want?"

The Law of Attraction truly works "automatically" in your favor when you are clear on your passions and are living them!

But what if you're NOT clear?

What if you're one of the many people I meet who feels completely disconnected from their sense of Passion? What if when asked to describe your "ideal life" or "vision", you don't even know where to begin?

First, you need to know that this "disconnect" from your sense of passion is simply another form of resistance.

Many times, we stop putting attention on our passions early in life when our more traditional system of education and upbringing tends to put a child down a path on which the child has no real input.

If what you have learned about your passions are that they are "okay for a hobby but not a way to make a real living" or something similar, then it is no wonder that have disconnected yourself from your feelings of passion. It would be too painful to live with a sense of yearning to do something you believe you cannot do, so you create a story that you "don't know what your passions are."

I'm not saying that you do this intentionally, because I don't believe you do. It's simply a kind of emotional defense mechanism. If you believe that you don't know your passions, then you don't have to take responsibility for not living them. "If only I knew my passions", you might say, "I could put this Law of Attraction stuff to work in my life and things could change." But in saying that, you affirm to yourself that you DON'T know your passions, and that story becomes more and more real to you until you truly believe that you don't have anything in your life that you're passionate about.

Instead of feeling "bad", you have chosen to feel "numb."

Clearly, there is no real power in feeling numb. You can't attract anything with numb, except more numb. And too many people are going through life numb to their sense of passion, robbing themselves and others of the gift that they are to the world.

This idea that you don't know your passion, while it feels real right now, is an idea that you need to be willing to give up if you want to move into a fully satisfying life. We're here to live our passions, so let's not waste another minute not doing that!

Here are a few things to think about to help you tap into a lost sense of passion:

1. What do you daydream about? When your mind "goes off", there's a reason it goes where it goes. Many times our daydreams are our subconscious giving us a taste of what could be.

2. What would you do all day if you could do ANYTHING and money were not an issue for you at all? This is a very common question used to help people tap into their passions, because if you can truly generate the feeling of being freed up financially, you clear the way for yourself to think about what you'd TRULY like to do. But if you think about all this in terms of "will it make me money", you are cheating yourself.

You must not judge your passions on your beliefs regarding their money-making potential. Walking The Path takes care of that as we'll discuss more in Part 2, "The Journey."

I'll note that the answer to this question for many people is "Nothing! I would just do nothing all day." And that is a totally fair answer, and I invite anyone with that response to do a lot of visualization around a day filled with doing nothing, and see how those visions naturally evolve. They'll lead you to your passion...

3. What or who inspires you? If you can't immediately access your own sense of Passion, or put a label on it, I invite you to think about what or who in the world inspires you...and why.

You can learn a lot about yourself by looking at how you interpret people and situations. If someone inspires you because of what they're up to in the world, could that tell you more than a little something about what YOU might want to be up to in the world?

If you're inspired by some kind of creative expression like art, music, film, or theater, what exactly about the experience is inspiring you? Just because you're inspired by art, for example, doesn't mean that you have a destiny as an artist, however.

Things that inspire us aren't always the thing we're supposed to be or do. However, anything that evokes inspiration in us, opens a portal to the essence of who we are.

Next time you feel inspired by anything or anyone, it may be an interesting exercise to ask yourself why you're inspired. What part of yourself is being activated in this moment? What action - however large or small - do you feel called to take?

There are entire courses available to help you discover your sense of passion, but I believe that these few questions - if honestly answered - will give you very deep insight into what you're about.

There is No "I Tried" in Success - By Lora Morrow

2010-02-01T16:57:00.001-08:00

Those who say winning is not everything have probably never truly won anything because they do not know the true meaning of success. To recognize success, it is necessary first to define failure.

Failure is the refusal either to establish a plan or to work persistently toward its accomplishment, regardless of the challenges.

Most of us were never taught that failure is a matter of choice or that success is a matter of choice. Failure is not, as many believe, the result of lack of talent, money, time, or opportunity. Failure is simply the refusal to create opportunity and to establish goals or objectives in your life and to work toward their achievement. When talking to people who have neither goals nor motivation to succeed, you'll find that their lives have no excitement and no purpose. They feel like failures--and at that point they're justified in their feelings.

To succeed, you will constantly find yourself facing steep, foreboding cliffs and seemingly bottomless crevices. You will be doing things you have never done before. But if you want more from life than to get halfway up the mountain, you first will have to make the decision to go all the way. You may know neither exactly what is ahead nor how you are going to handle it. The only alternative, however, is not to go.

When striving to achieve your goals, there is no such thing as "trying."

That's right! We have all been told from the time we were children that it does not matter if we win or not, just as long as we try hard. This may be true in competition, such as an athletic contest. In that environment, we will run into people we could never beat, and the only satisfaction is that we gave it our all.

But in real life, where the objective is to achieve, that is one of the greatest lies you can tell yourself or anyone else. "Trying" is a word intended to rationalize failure. It is an excuse. In truth, when reaching for any objective, short term or long term, you either succeed or you don't. There is no in-between. "Trying," therefore, is not real.

Lack of immediate success, however, is not failure. It is nothing more than the feedback you may need to modify your target date and even your plan for reaching your goal. "I tried" is a quitter's statement. It means you have given up, that you have decided to continue your life having not reached your goals. This attitude is devastating to your personal effectiveness.

Drop the "I tried."

When you run head-on into a brick wall, find a way over it, around it, or through it. Get yourself back in the race with a new plan for winning.

Physical problems and conditions are great examples of "brick walls" because they occur and recur without warning. It is up to such a person to set a goal to keep going. No one, including doctors, can make such a decision for you. You must keep going until you find the right answer for yourself. Only you know what is right and what you can do.

The number of times you fall down does not determine whether you will eventually reach the top of the mountain. It is how many times you get up and get moving again. Implanting the word "try" in your mind is an acknowledgment that it is okay to give up instead of get up. Failure occurs only when you quit or make excuses for your inability to succeed. "Trying" is, therefore, lying to yourself about what you are really doing.

"I tried" is not an acceptable excuse. (But then, no excuses are acceptable alternatives to success.) Using the word "try" creates an illusion in your mind that your effort produced an "almost win" and stops you from moving on. Accepting failure as an alternative, consciously or unconsciously, diminishes the effectiveness and power to achieve your goals. Conversely, using the word "do" creates the opposite illusion in your mind that your effort produced a "finish until done" and helps you to move on.

I want to ask you a personal question. Five years from now, what will you be doing? Where, what will you be?

I've heard many persons say, "I want to get my problems under control, then I will go and do something." I'll let you in on a little secret: You may never get them fully "under control." What then? Are you going to waste your lifetime waiting for something to happen, or are you going to cause something to happen?

Fourteen years ago, I made a choice. I decided to graduate from college in the year of 1999. The doctors had provided me with little hope that I would ever overcome my epileptic seizures. Moreover, tests revealed that my problems impaired my cognitive abilities so much that my I.Q. would dip considerably when I was going through my worst times.

But I decided at that time that, come 1999, I would be having seizures with a degree or without one, so I might as well be having them with one.

In January 2000 I received my diploma: Bachelor of Science in Psychology. Yes, that was from my graduation ... in 1999. All during that ensuing four years, I suffered three types of seizures: tonic-clonic (grand mal), partial complex, and petite mal. Yet my diploma hangs on my wall ... just above my Master of Science certificate.

And I haven't had a tonic-clonic seizure in years. You see, that was a goal, too.

So where will you be? Five years from now is coming. There is nothing you can do about it. Are you going to wait until your circumstances are ideal before you begin your quest? If so, when the time comes to leave this world, you may very well still be waiting.

Okay, so you will "try." Okay, so you will fail. There is no reward in life for trying, only for doing! Set your goals, start on them now, and get them done!

Create Large Chunks of Time

2010-02-01T16:00:00.001-08:00

By: Brian Tracy

This strategy requires a commitment from you to work at scheduled times on large tasks. Most of the really important work you do requires large chunks of unbroken time to complete. Your ability to create and carve out these blocks of high value, highly productive time, is central to your ability to make a significant contribution to your work and to your life.

Thoughtfulness may be defined as a careful concern for the secondary consequences of each decision and each action. This is the essence of strategic thinking.

Start Immediately on Number One
Successful salespeople set aside a specific time period each day to phone prospects. Rather than procrastinating or delaying on a task that they don't particularly like, they resolve that they will phone for one solid hour between 10 and 11 AM and they then discipline themselves to follow through on their resolutions.

Many business executives set aside a specific time each day to call customers directly to get feedback.

Create Specific Amounts of Time
Some people allocate specific 30-60 minute time periods each day for exercise. Many people read in the great books 15 minutes each night before retiring. In this way, over time, they eventually read dozens of the best books ever written.

The key to the success of this method of working in specific time segments is for you to plan your day in advance and specifically schedule a fixed time period for a particular activity or task.

You make work appointments with yourself and then discipline yourself to keep them. You set aside thirty, sixty and ninety minute time segments that you use to work on and complete important tasks.

Create Preplanned Periods
Many highly productive people schedule specific activities in preplanned time slots all day long. These people build their work lives around accomplishing key tasks one at a time. As a result, they become more and more productive and eventually produce two times, three times and five times as much as the average person.

Action Exercises
Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.

First, organize each day to create large chunks of time you can use for key task completion.

Second, make a written appointment with yourself to work on a key task at a specific time.

Develop A Prosperity Consciousness

2010-01-30T20:49:00.000-08:00

By: Brian Tracy

The starting point of all riches is the development of a prosperity consciousness. You must become a financial success in your thinking long before you achieve it in your reality. Both poverty and riches are the result of a state of mind, and the most important single step you ever take on the road to wealth and financial independence is the decision to change your thinking, to impress into your mind an unshakable belief that you can and will achieve your financial goals. This must happen before anything else happens.

Think And Grow Rich
When I was growing up, I was fascinated by stories of successful men and women and how they made and lost their fortunes, and then made them over again. I read about the importance of a prosperity consciousness in the book, Think And Grow Rich, by Napoleon Hill, several times. But I never fully understood what it meant until about five years ago. Then it hit me and I've never been quite the same since. Every aspect of my life has improved dramatically, especially in the area of accumulating wealth, since I finally understood what is meant by a prosperity consciousness.

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Two Great Discoveries
Here are two of the most exciting principles ever discovered in the long search by mankind for the secrets of health, happiness and great personal wealth.

All Causation is Mental
The first principle is this. All causation is mental. That means that everything that you are or ever will be will be a result of how you use your mind. You are merely a mind with a body to carry it around with. The entire man made world that you see is simply an expression of thought. Your entire life is an expression of your own thinking. And since the quality of your thinking determines the quality of your life, if you improve the quality of your thinking, you must, you will, inevitably improve the quality of your life.

The Law of Expectations
The second principle is what we call the law of expectations. This law says that whatever you expect with confidence, positive or negative, becomes your reality. If you confidently expect to succeed, if you confidently expect to learn something from every experience, if you confidently expect to become wealthy as a result of applying your talents and abilities to your opportunities and you maintain that attitude of confident expectations long enough, it will become your reality. It will give you a positive optimistic cheerful attitude that will cause people to want to help you, and will cause things to happen the way you want them to happen.

Action Exercises
Here are two things you can do immediately to practice these principles in your day to day life:

First, start thinking today in a positive, optimistic, confident way about personal and financial success. Continually imagine what differences it would make in your life if you were financially independent. This is the starting point of developing a prosperity consciousness.

Second, develop your own attitude of positive expectations. Look for the good in every situation. Look for the valuable lesson in every setback or difficulty. Be positive and cheerful about everything that happens and you will be amazed at the difference it makes in your life.

Reversing Negative Momentum by John Maxwell

2010-01-27T17:14:00.000-08:00

Domino's Pizza recently launched a bold, unorthodox campaign to resurrect its image. In a series of ads and on its website, www.pizzaturnaround.com, Domino's airs actual customer complaints about the poor quality of its traditional pizza, and promises better taste from newly released recipes. It certainly must be painful for the pizza chain to admit that customers thought its pizza crust "tasted like cardboard" or felt its food was "bland" or "processed." Yet, Dominos' honesty has a refreshing ring. Not often does a business publicly assume responsibility a poor product.

Through its marketing blitz, Domino's Pizza is attempting one of the most difficult feats in leadership: reversing negative momentum. They aren't alone. 2008 and 2009 were tough years for almost everyone as stocks sunk, home prices plunged, and unemployment crept above 10%. How do leaders halt a downward slide, and change the direction of their teams and organizations?

Four Ways to Reverse Negative Momentum in Your Organization

1) Assume Responsibility for Your Situation

Yes, the economy has been bad, but unless you're Ben Bernanke, then there isn't much you can do about it. By blaming your troubles on the economy, you're putting yourself at the mercy of outside forces. Instead of worrying about what you cannot control, pour your energies into improving the areas within your sphere of influence. Take responsibility for the strength of your products, the health of your brand, and your relationships with key customers.

2) Be Willing to Slaughter the Sacred Cow

Many leaders cling to past successes and traditions to the point that they imperil their organization. Some, enamored with a product, make decisions based on emotional attachments rather than sound judgment. Others, stubbornly set in their ways, refuse to face their fears of change-even when their current business model is unsustainable.

Dominos had to scrap recipes a generation old in order to give itself a makeover. Ford Motor Company sold off Jaguar and Land Rover so that it could compete more effectively in the small-car market. What drastic changes might you need to consider in order to put your team in a better position?

3) Don't Just Listen to Customers; Lead Them

A business should always attune its ears to the customer. However, if customer complaints are your primary driver of change, then you're not a market leader. Domino's is probably overhauling its pizza a decade too late. Customer preferences shifted long ago, and the pizza chain is only now acting in response.

Innovative leaders understand their customers to the point that they are able to anticipate consumer needs. Apple Inc. serves as a prime example. The iPod and iPhone weren't responses to dissatisfied customers. Instead, these ahead-of-the-curve products brilliantly introduced new ways to access music and to experience multimedia content. Apple has scored a string of successes by leading customers rather than reacting to them.

4) Craft a Message for Change...Better Yet, Create the Conditions for It to Happen

Once morale has dipped, leaders have to craft an upbeat message to reverse the tenor of conversation. Yet, a sunny outlook itself won't do the trick. In the words of Lou Gerstner, the man who revived IBM, "You can't simply give a couple of speeches or write a new credo for the company and declare that a new culture has taken hold. You can't mandate it, can't engineer it. What you can do is create the conditions for transformation, provide incentives."

General David Petraeus knows well the challenges of reversing momentum. In Iraq, the general inherited a military operation muddled in a quagmire. He busily set about altering conditions within the country. Instead of attempting to seek and destroy enemy combatants, General Petraeus shifted resources in order to serve and protect the Iraqi people. As security improved, incentives were given for one-time insurgents to stop fighting and reenter public life. Thanks to the conditions orchestrated by General Petraeus, the situation in Iraq not only stabilized, it improved.

The Dilution Dilemma: Making Your Messages MatterBy Mark Sanborn, CSP, CPAE

2010-01-27T17:11:00.000-08:00

As a leader, do you ever feel your important messages fall on deaf ears?

Are your carefully constructed and communicated strategies always get implemented?

Are you often frustrated by the difference between the results you ask of others and what you actually get?

Leaders agonize when developing vision, mission and strategy. They carefully choose words and phrases. They painstakingly craft spoken and written communication to explain these important concepts. They communicate these messages in countless conversations and presentations.

Yet if you asked the typical employee what their leader's message is-what is truly important and how it should shape their decisions, actions and interactions-they'd be hard pressed to provide more than a vague summary.

Why?

The answer: The Dilution Dilemma. By the time the message is passed down or through the organization, the clarity, effectiveness and impact are dramatically diluted.

What can you do to minimize or eliminate this costly dilution?

The antidote can be summarized by these four words: constant, clear, catchy and compelling.

Constant. The best messaging loses effectiveness when it changes. The more often messaging changes, the less believable future messaging becomes.

Repetition is the mother of both retention and understanding. When followers hear the same messages repeatedly they realize there must be a reason, and the reason is importance. Often the first time a message is heard it is ignored or discounted. Why? Employees assume they'll hear it again if it really is significant. They are used to fleeting ideas and concepts and have learned to tune out those that aren't emphasized.

Constant communication of the same messages can be a crazy maker for leaders but it is necessary nonetheless. You need to stick to you messaging until you are sick and tired of repeating it. Only at the point of near nausea can you safely assume the message has been both heard, understood and believed to be important.

The messages you send as a leader will be repeated with less frequently as they move through the organization. That's why you need to front-load the system with constant repetition. A few mentions by leaders at the top get diluted to a miniscule amount of information at the bottom of the org chart.

Clear. Ambiguity is the enemy of success. When people aren't clear on what you mean, they fill in the blanks, and usually incorrectly.

There is a scene in the movie Philadelphia where the character played by Tom Hanks is doing an initial consultation with a lawyer played by Denzel Washington. Although I saw it over twenty years ago, I still recall how the lawyer communicated with the potential client about his situation. He said, "Explain it to me like I'm a second grader." Despite his intellect and skill, he knew only a complete and thorough explanation would provide the information he needed.

And that is clarity. You must cut through the superfluous to find the substantive and communicate it in such a way that there can be no misunderstanding.

Leaders build their messages on irreducible minimums. They know that if they can't succinctly explain what they mean, they won't be understood by others. Recall the childhood game of telephone where a statement is passed by whispering to another which they in turn whisper to another. Within a few of these "transmissions" the content of the original message has completely morphed. This is yet another effect of the dilution dilemma.

Don't tell people you're explaining it like they're second graders, but be just as clear and thorough as if you were.

The end result you need as a leader is not mere acceptance and understanding but action. Be clear on what people must do as a result of what you're telling them. You can't insinuate what needs to be done; clarity requires a call to action.

Catchy. Your audience is bombarded with messages in every conceivable medium. Being catchy is about breaking through the clutter and being memorable.

What about your message will stick in the mind of the reader or hearer? Here's the test: will they be able to accurately convey what you've communicated? Your job as a leader is to make their job of understanding and repeating easy. More importantly, catchy messages make us want to repeat them. We all love the catchy and the clever and quickly tire of the mundane.

Stories, metaphors, analogies, mottos and even clichés are among the tools you can use. Spend as much time in the packaging of what you're trying to convey as you do developing the content of the message.

Remember, facts validate, but stories illustrate. The best statistical analysis in the world will be diluted to the point of nothingness if it isn't packaged in a catchy, memorable story or illustration.

Compelling. The ultimate guard against dilution is to make your important messages compelling. People can be clear and able to act on the information but they won't without reasons that make sense to them. That is the essence of creating compelling message: getting people to care enough to do something. Compelling ideas are powerful; they have the ability to induce action.

And that requires emotion. Take it from two experts in the field, Dan and Chip Heath, authors of Made to Stick: "A credible idea makes people believe. An emotional idea makes people care."

Leaders tend to have credible ideas but often stop short of compelling ideas. A leader knows why action should be taken, but that familiarity can prevent them from thinking through the reasons others need to follow through.

To avoid dilution, answer the question lingering in the listener's mind: why should I care? That is a more effective question than "Why is this important?"

Ideas must be robust to be strong and withstand the almost inevitable affects of the dilution dilemma. As a leader, the strength o f your ideas and messages comes from constant and clear communication that is designed to be catchy and compelling.

About

Mark Sanborn is the president of Sanborn & Associates, Inc., an idea lab for leadership development. Leadershipgurus.net lists Mark as one of the top 15 leadership experts in the world.

Mark has presented over 2200 speeches and seminars in every state and 10 countries. His book, The Fred Factor: How Passion in Your Work and Life Can Turn the Ordinary Into the Extraordinary is an international bestseller and was on the New York Times, Business Week and Wall Street Journal bestseller lists. His latest books include You Don't Need a Title to be a Leader: How Anyone, Anywhere Can Make a Positive Difference and The Encore Effect: How to Achieve Remarkable Performance in Anything You Do.

For more information visit www.marksanborn.com

Secrets of Successful Teams by Chris Widener

2010-01-27T16:17:00.000-08:00

To be a success is not always to be a success individually. In fact, most of the time, we achieve our successes as part of a team.

We are all part of teams. Our family is a team. Our place of work is a team. The community groups we belong to are teams. Sometimes we are the team leader or “coach,” while other times we fulfill the role of follower or “player.” It is so important, then, for us to understand teams and how they work, especially those who achieve success—the achievement of their desired goal.

In my life, I have been on some successful teams, and some not-so-successful teams. This includes both athletically as well as professionally. When I was growing up, I worked for seven years with the Seattle Supersonics, our local National Basketball Association team, which now plays in Oklahoma City as the Thunder. They were at times unsuccessful and, in 1979, my second year working there, the most successful team in the league, winning the World Championship. I have been able to see firsthand what makes the difference between the unsuccessful teams and the successful ones.

Here are some principles I know that, when implemented on a regular basis, can turn any lackluster team into an outstanding one! These principles can be applied to your family, your business, your organization and, yes, your sports team.

Communication/Leader
The leader needs to communicate the vision. If they are setting the pace, they need to let people know where they are going so that the team can follow. The coach always does a pre-game talk, laying out the vision.

The leader communicates the vision frequently, so as to always be updating the team as to where they are at and what changes need to be made. The coach doesn’t relegate the direction he gives to the pre-game; he coaches and communicates all the way through the game.

Team
Watch a good basketball team. They are talking to each other all of the time. Helping one another out, encouraging one another, praising one another, and telling each other how they can make changes so the same mistakes aren’t made again. The same is true of successful teams in the professional world, and in life in general.

Excellence
The truly great teams are teams that are committed to excellence. In everything they do, their goal is to achieve at the highest level. And this commitment is held throughout the team and at every level. A successful team cannot have members who are not committed to excellence, because in the end, they will become the weak link.

Followership
If you want a fascinating read, pick up The Power of Followership by Robert Kelley. The author basically makes the point that the secret to getting things done lies not only in great leadership, but in how well everyone else, 99 percent of the team, follows the leadership. Good teams are filled with people who are committed to following and getting the job done.

Understanding Roles
Pardon the Chicago Bulls analogy, but it is so clear. In the team’s championship years, when the game was on the line, with only one shot left, everyone—the coaches, the players, the 20,000 people watching in the stadium and millions watching on TV—knew who would shoot the last shot. That was Michael Jordan’s role.

Every team works best when the members of the team have clearly defined and understood roles. Some do one thing, others do another. One isn’t better or more important than the other, just different. When teams operate out of their strengths and their roles, they win.

Strengths and Weaknesses
This brings me to strengths and weaknesses. Every team member has strengths and weaknesses. The successful teams are those who on a regular and consistent basis enable the members to operate out of their strengths and not out of their weaknesses. And one person’s strength will cover another’s weakness. This is teamwork, enabling all of the bases to be covered.

Fun
The team that plays together stays together. Is your team all work and no play? If you’re smart, that will change. Get your team out of the office once a month and go have some fun. Enjoy one another. Enjoy life. It will bring a sense of bonding that can’t be made even in “winning.”

Common Goals and Vision
I have found that these need to have three aspects: short, simple and clear. Can you say it in less than 30 seconds? Is it simple? Can you and others understand it? Does the team all know what they are working together for?

Appreciation
All through the “game,” successful teams appreciate one another and show it in a variety of ways. The coach shows it to the players, the players show it to the coach, and the players show it to one another.

Here is a “Successful Teams” checklist you can use for evaluation:

Is there communication between coach and players and from player to player?
Is your team committed to excellence?
Do those on the team know what it means to follow?
Does everyone on my team know their specific role?
Do the individuals on our team regularly operate out of their strengths as opposed to their weaknesses?
Does our team take a break from time to time to just have fun together?
Do we understand our common goals and vision? Can we all state it (them)?
Is there a sense of and communication of genuine appreciation among my team?

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Visualize and Expect Success

2010-01-26T16:34:00.001-08:00

Our studies of high achievers have shown that no matter how different their personalities, work habits, occupations or gender, the people who accomplish great things in life have visualized and expected success all along. They’ve had the ability to vividly picture their achievements and to reassure themselves in the face of long odds that they would come through.

To visualize the person you want most to become, set aside some time this week in which you can create an atmosphere conducive to re-affirming your life dreams. You may want to be near the ocean, or a lake, or in a park, in a garden or in the woods. Or you might just sit quietly by yourself in a comfortable lounge or chair. Get yourself in the mood for visualizing. When the left hemisphere of the brain is quiet and relaxed, the mind is most receptive to creative inputs. To facilitate this you may want to use soothing recorded music, preferably slow and inspiring like Bach, Handel or Vivaldi if you like classical music, or soft, popular instrumentals from epic movies or other mood music.

Once you’re properly relaxed and optimistic, let your mind focus on who you really want to become. Visualize the future in two time frames: five years from now and ten years from now. First, design a day in your life five years from now. Who are you five years from now? Where are you professionally and geographically? On Monday mornings, where do you go?

What are you doing, seeing, feeling and thinking? Who are the people around you? What’s different about your life five years from now?

Next, project ahead ten years from today. Picture a film of your life at that time. Who is watching it with you? What dramatic moments are depicted by that film? What personal triumphs are revealed? What obstacles are courageously overcome?

Don’t be shy! The purpose of this exercise is to load visualized software in your mental computer. Just as a computer must be configured to accept specific materials, your mind must be prepared to accept the reality of your greater success. By introducing positive images of goal achievement, you’re preparing yourself to translate those goals into reality.

I especially like to visualize myself being introduced at a dinner in my honor. Maybe it’s the Coaches’ Hall of Fame! Don’t laugh! It could happen! The emcee comes to the microphone and reads the highlights of my life and adds some insights as to who I really am. What would the emcee be saying about you if such a dinner were held in your honor ten years from now? Devote a page in your journal to describing the things you would want said about you.

This visualization will put you on a path that leads to your future self that you vividly picture today!

—Denis Waitley

Take 100% Responsibility for Your Life - STARTING TODAY!

2010-01-21T18:00:00.001-08:00

by Jack Canfield

This isn’t a trick question.

Certainly you know the answer—the person who has been responsible for the life you live right now: YOU.

Everything about you is a result of your doing or not doing... Your income. Debt. Relationships. Health. Fitness level. Attitudes and behaviors.

I've often said that you are either creating or allowing everything that is happening in your life.

I think everyone knows this in their hearts, but often times people convince themselves into thinking that external factors are the source of their failure, disappointment, and unhappiness.

External factors do not determine how you live. YOU are in complete control of the quality of your life, by either creating or allowing the circumstances you experience.

When I hear people complain about the state of their life (be it their problems with personal finances, weight, their jobs, or general dissatisfaction), I like to help them see things differently.

If they feel “stuck” and unable to move forward for whatever reason, I ask them to scrutinize both what is working well and what isn’t working well in their life and see how they’ve arrived at where they currently are.

For example, if a woman tells me she’s unhappy with her weight—she travels frequently, and has no to time to exercise or seek healthy foods—I point out that her weight is not a result of her travels and schedule. It’s an outcome of what she chooses to eat and how she chooses to move, regardless of her daily agenda. Why not make a conscious effort to pre-plan healthy meals and snacks, even if it’s on the go, and sneak in 10 minutes here and 10 minutes there to be physically active (hey, I know some frequent flyers that make it a habit of running through airports!).

If you’re frustrated with any area in your life, then it’s time to take a little inventory.

Certainly there are wonderful things happening, whether it’s your job, your romantic relationship, your children, your friends, or your income level. Your accomplishments are just as important as your missteps.

First, congratulate yourself on your successes; and then take a look at what isn’t working out so well. What are you doing or not doing to create those experiences?

Watch out! If you find yourself beginning to complain about everything but the choices you’ve made, then you need to take a step back. See if you can stop blaming outside factors for your unhappiness.

When you realize that you—and only you—create your experiences, you’ll realize that you can un-create them and forge new experiences whenever you want.

How empowering is that!

You must take responsibility for your happiness and your unhappiness, your successes and your failures, your good times and your bad times.

All too often we choose to claim the successes and blame the failures on others or other circumstances. When you stop blaming, however, you can take that energy and redirect it to focus on shaping a better situation for yourself. Blaming only ties up your energy. Imagine roping all the energy into a positive effort.

Some ideas to make this happen:

1. Believe, Believe, Believe! Have unwavering faith in yourself, for good and bad. Make the decision to accept the fact that you create all your experiences. You will experience successes thanks to you, and you will experience pain, struggle, and strife thanks to you. Sounds a little strange, but accepting this level of responsibility is uniquely empowering. It means you can do, change, and be anything. Stumbling blocks become just that—little hills to hop over.

2. Take no less than 100% responsibility . Successful people take full responsibility for the thoughts they think, the images they visualize, and the actions they take. They don't waste their time and energy blaming and complaining. They evaluate their experiences and decide if they need to change them or not. They face the uncomfortable and take risks in order to create the life they want to live.

3. Stop complaining . Look at what you are complaining about. I’m fat. I’m tired. I can’t get out of debt. I won’t ever get a better job. I can’t stand the relationship I have with my sister. I’ll never find a soulmate in life. Really examine your complaints. More than likely you can do something about them. They are not about other people, other things, or other events. They are about YOU.

4. Make an immediate change. Are you unhappy about something that is happening right now? Make requests that will make it more desirable to you, or take the steps to change it yourself. Making a change might be uncomfortable for you. It might mean you have to put in more time, money, and effort. It might mean that someone gets upset about it, or makes you feel bad about your decision. It might be difficult to change or leave a situation, but staying put is your choice so why continue to complain?

You can either do something about it or not. It is your choice and you have responsibility for your choices.

5. Pay attention. Looking to others for help and guidance is helpful, but don’t forget to stay tuned in to yourself—your behavior, attitude, and life experiences. Identify what’s working and what isn’t. If you need to, write it all down. Then…

6. Face the truth and take action for the long term . You have to be willing to change your behavior if you want a different outcome. You have to be willing to take the risks necessary to get what you want. If you’ve already taken an initial step in the right direction, now’s the time to plan additional steps to keep moving you forward, faster.

Isn’t it a great relief to know that you can make your life what you want it to be? Isn’t it wonderful that your successes do not depend on someone else?

If you need just one thing to do different today, than you did yesterday, make it this:

Commit to taking 100% responsibility for every aspect of your life. Decide to make changes, one step at a time. Once you start the process you’ll discover it's much easier to get what you want by taking control of your thoughts, your visualizations, and your actions!

Sales Plan? What is a Sales Plan?

2010-01-20T16:49:00.000-08:00

By Wendy Weiss, The Queen of Cold Calling

In the past, if you said the word "plan" to me, I would bolt and run. I'm the "creative type," a former ballet dancer and choreographer-I'm terrible with details. When I was dancing professionally, all the details were taken care of; all I had to do was show up and dance. Even when I was choreographing, as long as I met my deadline for when the dance needed to be completed, I could go with the moment, go with the impulse and see where the dance led.

A hearty dose of reality hit when I began to run a dance company. All of a sudden, I had people-employees, volunteers and dancers-waiting. I had to know where we were going and how we were going to get there. It was a different world. Every decision had impact down the line. If we were going to have a spring season, I needed to know what we would be performing and where we'd be performing it. How many dancers would I need? What about costumes? Were we going to commission music? What would it cost? How would we pay for it all?

It took a long time for me to grasp the impact of having a plan. Because I was running a small, grass roots organization, there never seemed to be enough time, people, money or resources. I was always putting out fires. Every plan I developed changed the moment I keyed in the last sentence and printed it out. Plan-who has time to plan? Especially when the plan keeps changing.

Over time, I began to see the planning process as a road map. You know your ultimate goal. You figure out the best way to get there. Your plan needs to include contingencies and have enough space that you can deal with fires and still move forward. And sometimes, the plan changes; it might need some adjustment or "tweaking." As long as the goal remains the same and as long as you keep taking steps forward to achieve that goal, your plan will help you get there.

In sales, your goal is revenue-driven. How much money do you want to make? Or a better question: How much profit do you want to make? Then, how are you going to achieve that?

Your basic plan should start with a dollar amount and work backwards. If, for example, you want to gross $500,000 in sales this year, on average, how many sales would that be? What is the dollar value of your average sale? On average, how many prospects do you have to see or speak with to close one sale? So, how many prospects would you need to see or speak with to close the number of sales you would need to reach your goal of $500,000? What steps do you need to take to see or speak with that many prospects?

Wow! What a mouthful! Here is a mathematical formula:

First:
Value of average sale =______________
How many prospects must you speak with to close one sale: _______________

Then:
(Gross sales) (Average dollar value of sale) = Total number of sales needed

(Number of prospects you must speak with to close one sale) X (Total number of sales needed) = Total number of prospects

This formula, then gives you the total number of prospects you must speak with in order to reach your sales goal. Do your own calculations.

Having a sales action plan will bring immediate payoffs in all areas of sales from prospecting to presenting to responding to objections, closing and beyond. Join The Queen in this upcoming information-packed webinar: Your Sales Action Plan for Shattering Sales in 2010.
http://www.wendyweiss.com/jan2010webinar.html

******************************************************************************

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Please reprint these articles in your own email, online or printed publications. It's free as long as you give credit (by Wendy Weiss) and mention the web site (http://www.wendyweiss.com) and email address wendy@wendyweiss.com.

Your Automatic Pilot to Goal Achievement by Denis Waitley

2010-01-20T16:42:00.001-08:00

Every living organism has a built-in autopilot to help it achieve its goal, which is, in very basic terms, to live. In more primitive forms of life, to live simply means physical survival for both the individual and the species. This built-in mechanism or instinct in animals is limited to finding food and shelter, avoiding or overcoming enemies and procreation to ensure the continuation of the line.

Humans have intelligence and emotional and spiritual needs and capabilities, which animals do not have, and we often overlook the fact that human beings have a success instinct. Animals cannot select their goals; their success mechanisms are limited to those inborn goal images that are called instincts. The success instinct in the human being, however, has something that animals will never possess: the creative imagination. The human being is the only creature on earth that can direct his or her future by choice. You are more than a creature; you are a creator. You choose what your reticular activating system in your brain gives credit to. And you choose what you are looking for in the future through the repeated use of your creative imagination. The way you perceive your world defines the world in which you live. To see it in its unlimited range of possibilities is to see with the quantum mind.

The perceptions we hold of ourselves, or our self-images, determine the kind and scope of people we are; our self-images are our life-controlling mechanisms and dwell at the subconscious level of thinking. Responsible for autonomic body control, such as breathing and heartbeat, and also for storing conditioned reflexes (repeated skills or images), the subconscious can be compared to a navigational guidance system or automatic pilot. The conscious level of thinking, responsible for collecting information from the environment, storing it in the memory and making rational decisions, can be compared to an attorney or judge.

Guidance systems can be programmed to seek an image or target. They are installed in missiles and spacecraft, which are then guided by these highly sophisticated electronic systems to seek a target through the use of electronic data feedback. The homing torpedo, for example, is a self-propelled system that makes every correction necessary to stay on target and score a hit by constantly monitoring feedback signals from the target area and adjusting the course setting in its own navigational guidance computer. Programmed incompletely or nonspecifically, or aimed at a target too far out of range, the homing torpedo will wander erratically until its propulsion system fails or it self-destructs.

So it is with each of us. Set a goal or an image, and this self-motivated system, which constantly monitors self-talk and environmental feedback about the goal, adjusts the self-image settings in our minds and makes every decision necessary to reach the goal.

Most of the information fed into your subconscious memory stays there. The billions of separate bits of input stored over a lifetime are all there awaiting retrieval, and can never be willfully erased by you. They can be overridden or modified over a period of time, but you are stuck with them for life. While performing brain surgery on patients who were conscious under local anesthesia, Dr. Wilder Penfield of the Montreal Neurological Institute stimulated certain brain cells with a weak electrical current. Incredibly, he found his patients remembering experiences that had happened to them many years before; it was as if each person had a videotape recorder in his or her head. One 35-year-old woman recalled her fifth birthday party in vivid detail. She saw all the children around her in party hats; she saw herself opening her presents, including a Dutch doll with wooden shoes, and she blew out the candles on her cake and made a wish. On the basis of this work, Dr. Penfield theorized that every experience, sight, sound, smell, taste and touch registers a pattern in the brain that stays long after the actual experience is consciously forgotten.

Recent research suggests that the brain can function like a holographic projector, which uses laser beams to project and reassemble three-dimensional images. If you’ve been through the delightful experiences of Disneyland, Walt Disney World or Epcot Center, you’ve been startled and amazed at the “real-life” ghosts and characters. Though they are just an assembly of light waves, they appear so solid that you could reach out and touch them! It is this holographic capability of the brain that makes your mind such a potent force.

Scientists agree that the human nervous system cannot tell the difference between an actual experience and one imagined vividly, emotionally and in detail. Many of your everyday decisions are based upon information about yourself that has been stored as truth but is just a figment of your imagination, shaded by your environment.

During every moment of our lives, we program our self-image to work for us or against us. It strives to meet the objectives we set for it, regardless of whether they are positive or negative, true or false or safe or dangerous. Like a videotape recorder playing its cassette, its sole function is to follow instructions implicitly, based upon previous inputs.

DETERMINATON

2010-01-20T16:13:00.000-08:00

In 1883, a creative engineer named John Roebling was inspired by an idea to build a spectacular bridge connecting New York with the Long Island. However bridge building experts throughout the world thought that this was an impossible feat and told Roebling to forget the idea. It just could not be done. It was not practical. It had never been done before.

Roebling could not ignore the vision he had in his mind of this bridge. He thought about it all the time and he knew deep in his heart that it could be done. He just had to share the dream with someone else. After much discussion and persuasion he managed to convince his son Washington, an up and coming engineer, that the bridge in fact could be built.

Working together for the first time, the father and son developed concepts of how it could be accomplished and how the obstacles could be overcome. With great excitement and inspiration, and the headiness of a wild challenge before them, they hired their crew and began to build their dream bridge.

The project started well, but when it was only a few months underway a tragic accident on the site took the life of John Roebling. Washington was injured and left with a certain amount of brain damage, which resulted in him not being able to walk or talk or even move.

"We told them so."
"Crazy men and their crazy dreams."
"It`s foolish to chase wild visions."

Everyone had a negative comment to make and felt that the project should be scrapped since the Roeblings were the only ones who knew how the bridge could be built. In spite of his handicap Washington was never discouraged and still had a burning desire to complete the bridge and his mind was still as sharp as ever.

He tried to inspire and pass on his enthusiasm to some of his friends, but they were too daunted by the task. As he lay on his bed in his hospital room, with the sunlight streaming through the windows, a gentle breeze blew the flimsy white curtains apart and he was able to see the sky and the tops of the trees outside for just a moment.

It seemed that there was a message for him not to give up. Suddenly an idea hit him. All he could do was move one finger and he decided to make the best use of it. By moving this, he slowly developed a code of communication with his wife.

He touched his wife's arm with that finger, indicating to her that he wanted her to call the engineers again. Then he used the same method of tapping her arm to tell the engineers what to do. It seemed foolish but the project was under way again.

For 13 years Washington tapped out his instructions with his finger on his wife's arm, until the bridge was finally completed. Today the spectacular Brooklyn Bridge stands in all its glory as a tribute to the triumph of one man's indomitable spirit and his determination not to be defeated by circumstances. It is also a tribute to the engineers and their team work, and to their faith in a man who was considered mad by half the world. It stands too as a tangible monument to the love and devotion of his wife who for 13 long years patiently decoded the messages of her husband and told the engineers what to do.

Perhaps this is one of the best examples of a never-say-die attitude that overcomes a terrible physical handicap and achieves an impossible goal.

Often when we face obstacles in our day-to-day life, our hurdles seem very small in comparison to what many others have to face. The Brooklyn Bridge shows us that dreams that seem impossible can be realised with determination and persistence, no matter what the odds are.

Even the most distant dream can be realized with determination and persistence.

The Power Of Choice-Jim Meisenheimer

2010-01-19T17:04:00.000-08:00

Just for a minute, think about where you are today, think about where you have been, and think about where you will be going.

Where you are today with your life is a result of the choices you've made in the past.

What you will become in the future will be the result of the choices you make today and tomorrow.

Scary proposition - isn't it?

Here's a short list of choices you are faced with almost on a daily basis.

Yes I can't! That's a choice isn't it, believing and feeling that you can't do something.

Yes I can! That's also a choice - choosing to believe that you can do anything within reason.

I can't. I can. I will. Can you see the subtle and powerful difference at work here? There's a huge difference in outcomes between I can't, I can, and I will. You get to choose!

You get to choose your expectations everyday. For example, you're scheduled to make a sales call with an especially difficult customer. Do you walk into the sales call thinking you'll get hammered on your pricing, or do you walk into the sales call expecting this sales call to be your best ever with this particular customer. You get to choose!

You get to choose your career. If you don't like your work, change it. If you don't like your career, change it. Forget about the economy and the recession because they have little to do with the choices you make. You get to choose!

You get to choose to be prepared. Funny thing about preparation is that it takes more work than improvisation. Funny thing about the results too, preparation generally achieves far superior results than improvisation. You get to choose!

You get to choose excellence over mediocrity. Why is it that a majority of salespeople choose mediocrity? If you always choose excellence you'll never, and I mean never, be a part of the mediocrity brigade. You get to choose!

You get to choose whether or not you want to exceed your customers’ expectations. You can be slow to commit and quick deliver. You can go out of your way to make every sales call a magic moment for your customers. You get to choose!

You get to choose to be ordinary or extraordinary. You realize of course it only takes a little extra in everything you do to be viewed as an extraordinary salesperson. You get to choose!

You get to choose by design to leave people feeling good when ever you meet with them. You recognize their accomplishments. They show gratitude for their business. You always walk in with a smile and walk out leaving them smiling. You get to choose!

You choose to keep learning instead of mental stagnation. You are an avid reader. You read the Wall Street Journal daily. You listen to CDs as you drive from account to account. You get to choose!

You choose to be rich or choose to struggle financially. You get to choose!

You choose to be cheerful or choose to be grouchy. You get to choose!

You can choose to be happy or choose to feel sorry for yourself. You get to choose!

You get to choose your attitude. Some people think the glass is half full. Others think it's half empty. A person with an extremely positive attitude believes his glass is overflowing with opportunities and possibilities.

During the Vietnam War, Air Force Colonel George Hall was shot down and captured in North Vietnam. He was a prisoner of war for 5.5 years.

“Though he was barefoot and dressed in his black prison uniform, shut up in a tiny cubicle, he discovered that through his mind he had an amazing freedom.

He was able to leave his prison cell clad in a Polo shirt and slacks. He wore clean black and white golf shoes. He could feel the thick green grass of Pebble Beach golf course in northern California.

The sun was shining and there was a gentle breeze coming off the Pacific Ocean. The Colonel played each hole, starting with the first and ending with the eighteenth. He studied each shot, measured each swing, felt each blade of grass between his fingers as he replaced every divot.

He noted the sand in each bunker, hit each shot, sank each putt and strode on to the next hole - all in his imagination.

Every day for five and a half years he played a perfect game of golf on the Pebble Beach course. The Colonel realized that only he had the power to make a choice between being resigned to his fate, of fear and hopelessness, or he could replay his happiest moments from the past, taking his mind off solitary confinement and setting it free upon a beautiful and famous golf course.

When he returned from his captivity, in his first golf game he shot a 76-not a bad score for a professional golfer, but even more amazing for an amateur. When asked how he had accomplished such a feat, he said, I never putted a green in more than two strokes during the last five years.

All those years of playing perfect games in the recesses of his mind, had produced a near perfect performance on a real golf course!”

You see, your attitude is everything about everything.

When it’s all said and done according to Joyce Nidetch, “Your choices determine your destiny.”

The Law of Time Perspective

2010-01-18T16:57:00.000-08:00

By Brian Tracy

The most successful people in any society are those who take the longest time period into consideration when making their day-to-day decisions. This insight comes from the pioneering work on upward financial mobility in America conducted by Dr. Edward Banfield of Harvard University in the late 1950's and early 1960's. After studying many of the factors that were thought to contribute to individual financial success over the course of a person's lifetime, he concluded that there was one primary factor that took precedence over all the others. He called it “time perspective.”

Plant Trees

What Banfield found was that the higher a person rises in any society, the longer the time perspective or time horizon of that person. People at the highest social and economic levels make decisions and sacrifices that may not pay off for many years, sometimes not even in their own lifetimes. They “plant trees under which they will never sit.”

Doctors

An obvious example of someone with a long time perspective is the man or women who spends ten or twelve years studying and interning to become a doctor. This person takes extraordinarily long time to lay down the foundation for a lifetime career. And partially because we know how long it takes to become a doctor, we hold doctors in the highest esteem of any professional group. We appreciate and admire the sacrifices that they have made in order to be able to practice a profession that is so important to so many of us. We recognize their long time perspectives.

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Long Time Perspectives

People with long term perspectives are willing to pay the price of success for a long, long time before they achieve it. They think about the consequences of their choices and decisions in terms of what they might mean in five, ten, fifteen, and even twenty years from now.

Short Time Perspectives

People at the lowest levels of society have the shortest time perspectives. They focus primarily on immediate gratification and often engage in behaviors that are virtually guaranteed to lead to negative consequences in the long term. At the very bottom of the social ladder, you find hopeless alcoholics and drug addicts. These people think in terms of the next drink or the next fix. Their time perspective is often less than one hour.

Delayed Gratification is the Key to Financial Success

Your ability to practice self-mastery, self-control, and self-denial, to sacrifice in the short term so you can enjoy greater rewards in the long term, is the starting point of developing a long time perspective. This attitude is essential to financial achievement of any kind.

Action Exercise

Practice a long term perspective in every area of your life, especially in your financial life but also with your family and your health. Think of where you would ideally like to be in five years and begin today to take steps in that direction.

Rejection is a Gift! - By Patricia Omoqui

2010-01-18T16:47:00.001-08:00

Did I get your attention? You might be sitting there thinking, "Patricia, you are really pushing it! You are just plain crazy with your positivity by calling rejection a gift. Rejection hurts too much to be good for me in any way." I can relate to your viewpoint because I used to feel that way too. All I ask of you this week is that you contemplate the ideas I share. You just never know how your perspective might expand if you do.

A reader emailed recently asking, "How do I tackle rejection?" As I responded I decided that I should devote an entire article to this topic since rejection is such a major and very common aspect of our daily and lifelong experience. It happens to us all, doesn't it?

We experience it when we are young. Parents criticize us -- some may even walk out of our lives or force us out of theirs. Friends call us names on the playground and talk about us behind our backs. The deep sting of rejection continues into puberty as our boyfriends and girlfriends leave us. I'm sure you remember your first break-up as if it was yesterday, don't you? Papers we submit are returned to us with low marks and negative comments from the teacher.

Our adult life is full of refusals. Business proposals get tossed aside by potential investors. Our friends and family members mock our dreams. Manuscripts we've written get thrown into a slush pile, never getting a second look. Even minor snubs upset us -- the taxi we desperately need passes us by.

When does this rejection stop?

Guess what. It doesn't. There are 6 billion people on this planet and whether we like it or not, each of us is entitled to his or her opinion. We each have freedom to shape our life experiences and that means we are all making choices every minute of every day. Sometimes the choice made leaves us out. If I take such a choice as a personal rejection, I feel deep pain.
Rejection need not be personal unless we choose to see it that way. As a hiring manager, I often interviewed dozens of candidates for one open position. Though I liked many of them and found their skills impressive, I could hire only one. It wasn't personal.

As a college girl I fell in love with a smart, good-looking athlete. I was certain that he was "the one" for me. However, after a year of dating he backed away. I was devastated. I couldn't understand why he didn't see that we were perfect for each other. Soon after he stopped dating me, he began dating another girl on campus. It took me many tears and much inner work for me to accept his choice.

As I sit here more than 10 years later, I am grateful that he was honest and moved on when he did. I see clearly now that a long-term relationship with him would have limited both of us. He gave me a gift through that "rejection." If I hadn't taken it to mean there was something wrong with me, I could have saved myself a great deal of grief.

I share these stories with you to encourage you to avoid the needless suffering that I have walked through. Rejection is never personal. If someone rejects me I have come to understand that it is not about me. If a parent or a spouse leaves, it's not because of some lack in you, it's because of their own inner issues. I invite you to notice how different you would feel inside if you could accept that as true. I now see that rejection offers me clarity and direction.
Consider the following ideas about rejection and see if any of them might offer you new perspectives to support you in your journey:

1. Rejection is not about you, it's someone making a choice based on their own, deeply felt inner needs and goals. It's futile to try to control another person. People think what they think and want what they want. What we can change is the way we choose to interpret another person's choice and how we respond to them. Each of us here on Earth is entitled to their own journey.

2. Rejection shows us our next opportunities for growth. It guides us to the wounds that we have within that need to be healed. The suffering we feel leads us to greater levels of self-awareness if we choose to learn and grow from the experience. When someone rejects us it shows us how sensitive we are and the ways we are probably still questioning and doubting ourselves.

3. If you don't reject you, nobody else can either. An important key to moving beyond rejection is to learn to love and accept yourself for who you are and where you are in life. If you accept and love yourself fully, would it matter if someone walked out on you? Of course, you might feel loss. Moving through the mourning process might be painful; it need not be devastating. When you are happy with you, people can say or do anything to you and it really doesn't affect you all that much. You listen to their comments as observations. Thank them for their honesty. Smile or shrug, and then move on with your day.

4. Rejection is a gift. Yes, seems strange to say it, but it is actually quite wonderful when someone honestly tells you they aren't interested in you! It opens the door for new things, better-suited friends and partners, and fresh experiences to enter your life. It is a blessing when people tell the truth and say what they are thinking! By doing this, they save us time and energy. I would much prefer someone to be real with me than to pretend that things are a way that they really aren't.

Take time this week to look more closely at the way you experience rejections -- the little daily ones and the big ones too. How strong is your emotional reaction when others bypass you? Would you save energy if you didn't take it to heart? If you could see rejection as an opportunity to move forward with clear direction, how might you feel about recent situations where people have left you out?

As actor Sylvester Stallone once said, "I take rejection as someone blowing a bugle in my ear to wake me up and get going, rather than retreat."

Food For Thought

"Do not waste yourself in rejection; do not bark against the bad, but chant the beauty of the good."

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

** To comment on this article or to read comments about this article, go here.

About the Author:

Patricia G. Omoqui 2009, All Rights Reserved

Patricia Omoqui is an internationally recognized inspirational speaker, life coach and writer. Patricia's mission in life is to inspire people to move beyond fear so they can reach their full potential.

To share your thoughts about this article, please email Patricia at allure@patriciaomoqui.com or visit her at her website.

Create Your Daily Personal Growth Schedule

2010-01-17T16:08:00.001-08:00

By Brian Tracy

There are seven disciplines you must develop if you want to achieve all that is possible for you. You can learn these disciplines through practice and repetition until they become automatic.

Goal Setting
Every morning, take three to five minutes to write out your top goals in the present tense. Get a spiral notebook for this purpose. By writing out your ten goals at the beginning of each day, you will program them deep into your subconscious mind.

This daily goal writing will activate your mental powers. It will stimulate your mind and make you more alert. Throughout the day, you will see opportunities and possibilities to move more rapidly toward your goals.

Planning and Organizing
Take a few minutes, preferably the night before, to plan out every activity of the coming day. Always work from a list. Always think on paper. This is one of the most powerful and important disciplines of all for high performance.

"Accomplish More in a Month Than Most People Accomplish in a Year"

Concentration on your Highest-Value Activities
Your ability to work single-mindedly on your most important task will contribute as much to your success as any other discipline you can develop.

Exercise and Proper Nutrition
Your health is more important than anything else. By disciplining yourself to exercise regularly and to eat carefully, you will promote the highest possible levels of health and fitness throughout your life.

Learning and Growth
Your mind is like a muscle. If you don't use it, you lose it. Continuous learning is the minimum requirement for success in any field.

Time for Important People in Your Life
Relationships are everything. Be sure that in climbing the ladder of success, you do not find it leaning against the wrong building. Build time for your relationships into every day, no matter how busy you get.

Time for Important People in Your Life
These seven disciplines will ensure that you perform at the highest level and get the greatest satisfaction and results from everything you do. Study these seven disciplines and then make a plan for how you can incorporate each of them into your daily life.

"A Goal Without a Plan is Only a Dream…"

A Success Lesson From the Past

2010-01-15T16:46:00.001-08:00

by anthony on January 15, 2010

The large block of marble stood in the center of the open-air workshop. The officials who had purchased the block were eager to get their project underway and began looking for an artist who could transform the stone block into a work of art.

A suitable artist was identified and work began on the project, but as time passed, the artist gradually lost interest and eventually walked away from his commission.

Another artist was found and work commenced once more, however, this second artist also lost interest and the entire project came to a grinding halt.

The block of marble then sat neglected in the yard of the workshop for over 25 years!…

Then one day, a young man in his twenties heard about the marble block and visited the yard. When he gazed upon the stone, the young man did not see a weathered old block of marble. Instead, he saw an opportunity waiting to be realized.

He negotiated with the owners of the marble block and in due course received permission to try his hand where others had failed.

For three long years the young man chipped away at the block of stone and tap by tap he transformed his dream into a reality.

In January 1504, the young man whose name was Michelangelo, unveiled his statue of David.

The secret of Michelangelo’s success was that he was able to combine two seemingly conflicting virtues.

The first of these virtues was Vision. Whereas most people looked upon the marble block and saw a neglected slab of stone, Michelangelo saw a magnificent statue trapped within the rock just waiting to be released.

“I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free”
- Michelangelo

In addition to having the ability to visualize his ultimate desire, Michelangelo also developed the virtue of Patience.

He knew that long lasting success did not come quickly or easily, but rather, it was the result of patiently chipping away at his goal each and every day.

“Genius is Eternal Patience”
- Michelangelo

Today, some five hundred years later, many of us spend time to develop a grand vision for our life, but then we quickly become impatient to make our vision a reality. All too often we become frustrated with our lack of progress and eventually give up on our goal entirely.

It is a rare individual who can combine the ability to visualize their goal with the patience to take the small daily steps necessary to transform that vision into reality.

Today I’d like to encourage you to approach your own goals in the same way that Michelangelo approached the creation of the statue of David.

Even though your current reality may resemble the worn out block of marble, challenge yourself to look deeper to find the hidden opportunity that is waiting to be realized.

Once you have identified your objective, resist the urge to become impatient. Instead, develop a mindset of quiet anticipation and chip away at your goal a little each day.

By combining the power of Vision with the virtue of Patience, nothing will stop you from creating your own masterpiece.

5 Reasons Why Dreams Don't Take Flight by Dr. John C. Maxwell

2010-01-06T17:27:00.000-08:00

Most of us never see our dreams come true. Instead of soaring through the clouds, our dreams languish like a broken-down airplane confined to its hangar. Through life, I have come to identify five common reasons why dreams don’t take flight.

No. 1 We Have Been Discouraged from Dreaming by OthersWe have to pilot our own dreams; we cannot entrust them to anyone else. People who aren’t following their own dreams resent us pursuing ours. Such people feel inadequate when we succeed, so they try to drag us down.If we listen to external voices, then we allow our dreams to be hijacked. At some point, other people will place limitations on us by doubting our abilities. When surrounded by the turbulence of criticism, we have to grasp the controls tightly to keep from being knocked off course.

No. 2 We Are Hindered by Past Disappointments and HurtsIn the movie Top Gun, Tom Cruise plays Maverick, a young, talented and cocky aviator who dreams of being the premier pilot in the U.S. Navy. In the film’s opening scenes, Maverick showcases his flying ability, but also displays a knack for pushing the envelope with regards to safety. Midway through the movie, Maverick’s characteristic aggression spells disaster. His plane crashes, killing his best friend and co-pilot.

Although cleared of wrongdoing, the painful memory of the accident haunts Maverick. He quits taking risks and loses his edge. Struggling to regain his poise, he considers giving up on his dream. Although the incident nearly wrecks Maverick’s career, he eventually reaches within to find the strength to return to the sky.

Like Maverick, many of us live with the memory of failure embedded in our psyche. Perhaps a business we started went broke, or we were fired from a position of leadership. Disappointment is the gap that exists between expectation and reality, and all of us have encountered that gap. Failure is a necessary and natural part of life, but if we’re going to attain our dreams, then, like Maverick, we have to summon the courage to deal with past hurts.

No. 3 We Fall into the Habit of Settling for AverageAverage is the norm for a reason. Being exceptional demands extra effort, sustained inspiration and uncommon discipline. When we attempt to give flight to our dreams, we have to overcome the weight of opposition. Like gravity, life’s circumstances constantly pull on our dreams, tugging us down to mediocrity.Most of us don’t pay the price to overcome the opposition to our dreams. We may start out inspired, but through time, we fatigue. Although never intending to abandon our dreams, we begin to make concessions here and there. Through time, our lives become mundane, and our dreams slip away.

No. 4 We Lack the Confidence Needed to Pursue Our DreamsDreams are fragile. They will be buffeted by assaults from all sides. As such, they must be supplied with the extra strength of self-confidence.

In Amelia Earhart’s day, women were not supposed to fly airplanes. If she had lacked self-assurance, she never would have even attempted to be a pilot. Instead, Earhart confidently chased after her dream, and she was rewarded with both fulfillment and fame.

No. 5 We Lack the Imagination to DreamFor thousands of years, mankind traveled along the ground: by foot, by horse-and-buggy, by locomotive, and eventually by automobile. Thanks to the dreams of Orville and Wilbur Wright, we now hop across oceans in a matter of hours. The imaginative brothers overcame ridicule and doubt to pioneer human flight, and the world has never been the same.

Many of us play small because we do not allow ourselves to dream. We trap ourselves in reality and never dare to go beyond what we can see with our eyes. Imagination lifts us beyond average by giving us a vision of life that surpasses what we are experiencing currently. Dreams infuse our spirit with energy and spur us on to greatness.

What Do You Want? by Jack Canfield

2009-12-29T17:36:00.000-08:00

People who have achieved their goals knew what they wanted in the first place. They decided what to go after, and they went after it. One of the most compelling reasons why people do not get what they want is that they never decided what they wanted! They never defined the desires of their hearts in complete detail.

Why don’t you know what you want? Why isn’t it spelled out in detail in your mind? Most likely, it is because you have lost touch with the desires of your heart. You were probably taught that you couldn’t have whatever you wanted. You were probably taught that it was more important to do what made other people happy. Seeking your happiness was considered selfish, so you learned not to define your happiness. Now, you find yourself completely unaware of what your preferences are, how you really want to live your life, and what your goals are for your life.

Take back your life! Start honoring your preferences, no matter how small they seem. Even if you don’t know what you prefer, pretend you do, and make a decision. You’ll be more keenly aware of whether that decision made you happy or not and you will learn your preferences!

Commit to this new belief: You deserve to have everything exactly the way you want it. Make it a priority to begin to know your wants and desires. Start simple by making a list of things you want to do and things you want to have. Keep writing until you find some of your core values, such as wanting to have loving relationships, to make a difference in your world or to be financially secure.

Think of what you love to do with your time. Write down several things that you love to do, and then make a list of all the ways you can think of to be making a living doing those things. Create a detailed description of the vision you have for your ideal life. Don’t limit yourself. Dream as big as you possibly can from your perspective right now.

In detail, what is going on in the financial area of your life? How much money do you make? How much do you have in savings and investments? What about your real estate? What kind of house or houses do you own? Create detailed visions of all the major areas of your life, your ideal career, your recreation time, your ideal body and physical health, your relationships with family and friends, your spiritual life, and the community in which you live. Create and write down your ideal vision for each area and review it on a daily basis.

All you have to do at this point is clarify your vision to yourself. Don’t worry about how it will happen right now. Once you have a clear picture of what you want going through your mind, the steps and opportunities to get it will appear. When you have completed your ideal vision of your life, share it with a supportive friend. Don’t let anyone talk you out of it! More than likely, they want the same thing for themselves but believe it’s impossible. Deciding what you want is the first step to getting what you want. Don’t put off creating your vision!

The Law of Superb Execution

2009-12-26T15:10:00.001-08:00

By Brian Tracy

Leaders are committed to excellent performance of the business task at hand, and to continuous improvement. A leader is the person who chooses the area of excellence for his or her team. A leader knows that excellence is a journey, not a destination. Leaders are committed to being the best in everything they do. They constantly strive to be better in their key result areas. They compare themselves with people, organizations, and products or services that are better than they are, and they are continually improving.

Standards of Excellence
Leaders set standards of excellence for everyone who reports to them. They are ruthless about weeding out incompetence and poor performance. Leaders demand quality work and insist that people do their jobs well. The leader sets the standard of excellence. No one, or no part of the organization, can be any better than the standard that the leader represents and enforces. For this reason, leaders are committed to personal excellence in everything they do.

Leaders are Learners
Leaders are learners, continually striving to be better in their work and personal lives. They read, take additional courses and seminars, and listen to audio programs in their cars. They attend conventions and association meetings, go to the important sessions, and take good notes. They are committed to learning and growing in every area where they feel they can make an even more valuable contribution to their work.

"Be an Outstanding Manager—Lead your Team to Maximum Results!"

Do you want to learn the methods of the world's best manager? You can learn the secrets of motivation and team building. You can become the leader everyone wants to follow. Simply stated, Masterful Management is full of skills and methods from the world's BEST managers...and you can learn them all in just ONE HOUR.
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Inspiring People
People are most inspired when they feel they are working for an organization in which excellence is expected. The very best way to motivate and inspire others is for you to announce your commitment to being the best in your field or industry. Then, continually benchmark your performance and the performance of your organization against the very "best in class" in your business.

Core Competencies
Leaders identify their core competencies, the vital tasks they do that are responsible for them being in business. They continually look for ways to upgrade these core competencies to assure that they maintain a competitive edge in the marketplace. Leaders think about the future and identify the core competencies that will be required for success in the years ahead. They then develop plans to acquire those core competencies well before they will be needed to compete effectively in the marketplace of tomorrow.

Action Exercise
Identify your personal core competencies. What are the essential skills of your job, the abilities that make you valuable, if not indispensable? What core competencies do you need to acquire if you want to be the best in your field in the years ahead? Make a plan today to develop the key skills and core competencies you will need tomorrow.

Unleashing the Power - Tony Robbins

2009-12-22T17:25:00.000-08:00

Helping people reach their greatest potential

Marc Figueroa December 2, 2008

Tony Robbins has coached U.S. presidents, Fortune 500 CEOs, sports and entertainment superstars—all seeking strategies to reach the next level in their lives and careers. People often call upon Robbins to help remove barriers holding them back and to inspire them to take action. This master motivator is equally adept at keeping a crowd of 10,000 people on its feet for hours. He's also addressed the World Economic Forum, British Parliament and Harvard Business School.

Robbins' message goes beyond positive thinking; intelligent thinking is what drives him. He understands that when people are feeling overwhelmed, frustrated and fearful, they're rarely capable of brilliant analysis and decision-making.

"Confidence and competence is not the same thing," Robbins tells SUCCESS, following his return from a recent seminar tour through Australia and India. "No one should go into their garden and chant, "There are no weeds. There are no weeds. There are no weeds." For people to be true leaders, they have to first see things as they are, not worse. Then see it better than it is, and then make it the way you see it.

"The bottom line is that people have within them a force that is so powerful, there is nothing that can keep them from doing, being, sharing, creating and giving whatever they envision in life," Robbins continues. "My entire life is helping people unleash that power. Nothing drives me more than to see someone or an organization transform and begin to pursue goals with a purpose that inspires them, and gives them a greater sense of meaning—in not only what they do, but who they are."

Harnessing Emotion to Fuel Change

As economic uncertainty continues to shake Wall Street and Main Street, many success-minded professionals are being put to the test. Robbins' work is particularly relevant now, when people can call on his tools to keep their heads together and develop what he calls "emotional fitness."

"If you're psychologically strong enough, you can not only survive, but you can thrive when tough situations occur, as opposed to letting the environment control you and take over," he says. "It's really about mastering strength within yourself so that you can conquer the outer world around you."

Robbins continues to attract thousands of people to packed arenas all over the world, seeking to take their lives to the next level. The human spirit is what inspires him. Human potential actualized is what drives him.

But momentum wasn't always on his side. The 48-year-old Robbins vividly remembers the days when he was living in a stark, 400-square-foot apartment in Venice, Calif., and reduced to washing dishes in the bathtub. He was 30 pounds overweight, had a dead-end job, and in relationships that weren't working.

"I was extremely unhappy and couldn't stand who I was because I knew I had the potential to be so much more," he says. "I think there are many people who can relate to what I was experiencing—the pain of being in a rut and feeling like there's no way out.

"There are many people who live in what I call 'No-man's Land,' a place where you're not really happy, but you're not unhappy enough to do anything about it," he says. "That's a dangerous place. It's a place where people numb themselves to their dreams. It's where they dismiss hope and accept what's in front of them instead of driving toward what they really want in life. I lived there for a time, but I eventually hit rock bottom, and I'm glad I did because it forced me to take action. My only option for survival was to dig deep—to summon my courage, determination, faith, compassion and commitment to transform my life. I learned so much from that experience because I used those negative feelings to fuel my change. For me, I had no choice. I had to change."

Breaking Through Limitations

That change has resulted in big business for Robbins, who serves as chairman of five companies all geared toward his creed of improving the quality of life for people around the world. Robbins Research International Inc., based in San Diego, stages more than 100 events a year, offers professional coaching services and a variety of multimedia programs, including his best-selling The Ultimate Edge and Personal Power CD programs, which have sold more than 35 million units worldwide. He also created the award-winning Namale Resort and Spa in Fiji, where he also spends a few months each year.

But none of the success he enjoys would ever have happened if he hadn't been able to find a way to break through his own limitations. He had to get clear about what he really wanted and harness the fuel of human emotion to force himself to consistently take action to make his dreams a reality. "I was my first client," he says.

Robbins has worked directly with more than 3.5 million people from more than 100 countries. And he's as active as ever, often spending more than 15 hours on stage per day for a four-day event. That may sound crazy to some, but for Robbins, it's just another day at the office.

"I'm obsessed with finding what makes the difference in the quality of people's lives," Robbins says, "I'm always reading, interviewing extraordinary individuals, studying their patterns and experimenting on how to integrate what I've learned to make a difference in peoples' lives. The energy that comes from connecting and helping to make a difference with thousands of people at once, or one-on-one, is the juice of life for me. When you're giving everything you have and those you're working with are throwing it back at you five times as hard, it's absolutely incredible. It's an extraordinary experience, so powerful that I get swept up in those magical moments. Sometimes I come off stage and I think it's 8 at night, and I'm reminded that it's 1 o'clock in the morning."

His business of helping others help themselves didn't grow overnight. When he started 30 years ago, Robbins was a pioneer in personal and professional development—which is a $10 billion industry today. Along the way, Robbins says he probably failed more times than he succeeded. But he looks at failures simply as results or outcomes that he learns from each time.

Science of Achievement

"Unfortunately, we're programmed to fear this thing called 'failure,' so we try everything we can to avoid it, which is pointless," he says. "Failure is often necessary for real learning to occur. But the answer is simple. If you didn't get the results you want, learn from the experience so that you have references about how to make better decisions the next time around. People who fear failure internalize their mistakes, and when they try to go after something in the future, they might think, "Well, I tried to go after a dream before and look what happened." This is what keeps people from taking the very action that could move them to accomplish their goals. Too many people want to avoid any hint of a problem. But overcoming obstacles is what gives us psychological strength—it's the very thing that forms character."

Over the years, Robbins has noticed patterns in what makes people succeed or fail, what makes them feel happy or sad, and what it is that creates a life of meaning and fulfillment versus a life of frustration and despair. He saw it early on in his own life, and he sees it in the people he spends time with today—whether it's a hungry entrepreneur, a seasoned corporate executive or a mid-level manager.

"I can tell you, after working with millions of people for more than three decades, success is no accident in any environment," Robbins says. "There are rules of the game that, if followed, will lead to consistent success. There are logical patterns of action, and specific pathways to excellence that I call the science of achievement. But none of that means much without the art of fulfillment. I have seen business moguls achieve their ultimate goals but still live in frustration, worry and fear. What's preventing these successful people from being happy? The answer is they have focused only on achievement and not fulfillment. Extraordinary accomplishment does not guarantee extraordinary joy, happiness, love and a sense of meaning. These two skill sets feed off each other, and makes me believe that success without fulfillment is failure."

The father of life coaching answers some questions about failure and success, and everything in between.

Q: How did you go from living in a small apartment, practically broke, to the successful and fulfilled person you are today?

Anthony Robbins: I took advantage of my intense pain, and I turned it into the fuel for action. When you're living in a 400-square-foot bachelor apartment, cooking on a hotplate above your trash can and washing your dishes in the bathtub, you have to start looking at yourself. On top of that I was 30 pounds overweight, had a job that was going nowhere, and I was in relationships I hated. What changed me? I had a series of experiences with frustration at myself, and moved into unbelievable humiliation. I began to realize that who I was as a man—how I was living mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually and financially—was far less of a man than who I really was inside. When I hit that threshold of pain, I didn't know at the time what I was doing, but I decided at the very minimum I was going to go on a run.

You have to understand; I hadn't run or exercised intensely for probably three years. But at the peak of that physical intensity, my nervous system was wired. I had made radical changes in my body. So I grabbed a journal there on the beach, drew a line in the middle of the page, and on one side wrote everything I would no longer stand for in my life, which was virtually everything I was living at the time. And on the other side I wrote everything I was now committed to. But I didn't yet know how I was going to make the change. I knew what I was going to change and why. This is the day that I turned my life around. It unleashed me. I began to search for the answers, but instead of just reading about them, or hearing them, I began to apply them. And I changed everything in my life. I lost 30 pounds in a little more than 30 days. I transformed emotionally, physically, spiritually and financially. Within a year, I had begun to live the dreams that I once thought were impossible. I'd tell anyone that if you're going to change your life, you have to:

Decide what you will no longer stand for and what you'?re committed to. Clarity is power.
Take massive action. You have to be willing to do the things you don't want to do. You have to build a momentum that consistent action produces.
Notice what's working and what's not working. And when it's not working, change your approach. And keep changing until you finally achieve what it is you're committed to.

Q: You talk about people living an extraordinary life. What is your definition of an extraordinary life?

AR: I think the answer is different for everyone. Ultimately, an extraordinary life is life on your terms. For some people it might be creating their own business or starting a nonprofit foundation. For others it may be making several million dollars. For someone else it might be the ultimate satisfaction of raising a son or daughter to be an extraordinary soul. It could be creating a garden, writing a poem or just truly enjoying every breath of life. I think the most important thing is for you to defi ne what would be an extraordinary life for you today because it changes as our lives change. We don't want to be living off an old script. Otherwise, you may fi nd yourself with one of those insane moments where you actually achieved your goal and then your brain says, 'Is this all there is' There's no worse feeling in life. Take a moment to update your wish list and ask yourself, 'If my life was truly extraordinary, if it was magnificent, by my own definition, what would my life be like today: physically, emotionally, with my family, in my career, in my level of happiness?' Set the standard for yourself so your brain, body and soul know what you're committed to creating.

For me personally, an extraordinary life is living what you were made for. For me, that means, first of all, giving and sharing love, and I'm truly blessed to have that kind of love in my relationship with my wife, Sage. But an extraordinary life for me is also finding a way to make a difference for others to grow and love. The driving force in my life is to help make a measurable difference in the quality of life for people everywhere. It is my greatest joy to share the tools and strategies for creating a life of meaning and fulfillment. Nothing stokes me more than to see someone or an organization transform and begin to pursue goals with a purpose that inspires them, and gives them a greater sense of meaning—in not only what they do, but who they are.

Q: How have you learned from your past setbacks and failures?

AR: Like most people, I've had as many, if not more failures than successes. But what's been helpful is that I've worked hard to learn from these mistakes so I don't have to repeat them. I realized along the way that if we can learn from our mistakes, we can create shortcuts that can help us to make a measurable difference for other people in their lives. When you recognize a pattern for failure, you can avoid it. And when you recognize a pattern for success, you can take the on-ramp for what you want much more quickly. I call these 'Pathways to Power.' And my life is truly about sharing those strategies, those pathways, those shortcuts that allow us to save ourselves time and pain. Ultimately, what I've learned, though, is that life is not about success or failure; it's about meaning. It's about the interpretation we give to each event in our life—and not the event itself. Meanings are shaped by what we believe and what we value.

Just remember, two people can have the same circumstances, but they pull different meanings from it, and therefore a different set of emotions, actions, and a different life.

Q: You are sometimes referred to as a motivational speaker. Is that an accurate description?

AR: My work has never been about motivation. It's true that when people see news coverage of my seminars they see 10,000 people jumping or celebrating. I just understand that in order to get peak performance, you have to get people in a peak state. What we do is based on the state we're in. And training people's minds and bodies to be at their best is exciting and rewarding.

But ultimately, who I really am is the 'Why' guy. If somebody says to me, 'I don't need any motivation,' I'll say, 'That's obvious. You're already motivated. What I want to know is: What is your motive for action? I want to know, for example, why you claim that you want to lose weight, yet each day, you seem to be motivated to eat things that cause you to gain weight.' The ultimate question is 'Why?' And when you can answer this question, you can change your life forever. Part of my job is to help people uncover the inner conflicts that hold them back, to find the conflicts in their motivations. When you can uncover these conflicts and shift them, you can change anything in your life.

Q: It seems there's more uncertainty in the world now than ever. What do you say to people who are uncertain about their future?

AR: It's true the world has changed dramatically over the last few years, and it's going to continue to change. The pace of change is more rapid than ever. But one thing is constant—there are seasons in everyone's life just as there are seasons in nature. There's a passageway that, if you see it, it will pull you out of the uncertainty and guide you on how to maximize this time in your life. The transformation of the quality of life for early humanity came when seasons were recognized. Until then, man had to wander as a hunter and gatherer, moving from place to place. But once we understood the seasons, we knew when to plant, when to protect, when to reap. And man could have roots. He could have sustainability. He could have certainty for his future.

These kinds of seasons not only shape our personal lives, but there are seasons in history as well. Every 100 years has roughly four primary seasons in it. If you're a student of history, you know there are economic cycles, and cycles of war. You think things are tough today? If you were born in 1910, what was happening in the world by the time you were 19 years old? It was 1929 and the Great Depression occurred. In the next major cycle in life, around 29 years old, World War II broke out. And yet this generation faced these incredible challenges—this financial, emotional and international winter if you would—and by fighting through it, they built a psychological and emotional muscle that makes us still call them the 'Great Generation.'

The secret to life is threefold. It's to understand what season of life you're in, to understand what season the world is in, and to figure out how to take advantage of it. I teach everyone in my seminars how to find the season they're in, which is different for everyone, and to take advantage of it. That's the secret to experiencing an extraordinary life.

Developing a Powerful Sales Personality

2009-12-22T17:00:00.001-08:00

By Brian Tracy

Becoming excellent in closing sales is an inside job. It begins within you. In sales, your personality is more important than your product knowledge. It is more important than your sales skills. It is more important than the product or service that you are selling. In fact, your personality determines fully 80 percent of your sales success.

Take Charge of Your Life
The biggest mistake you can make is to ever think that you work for anyone but yourself. From the time you take your first job until the day you retire, you are self employed. You are the president of your own entrepreneurial corporation, selling your services into the marketplace at the highest price possible. You have only one employee—yourself. Your job is to sell the highest quality and quantity of your services throughout your working life.

View Yourself as Self-Employed
In a study done in New York some years ago, researchers found that the top 3 percent of people in every field looked upon themselves as self-employed. They treated the company as if it belonged to them personally. They saw themselves as being in charge of every aspect of their lives. They took everything that happened to their company personally, exactly as if they owned 100 percent of the stock.

Winners Versus Losers
The difference between winners and losers is quite clear. Winners always accept responsibility for their actions. Losers never do but instead always have some kind of explanation for why they are doing poorly.

Don't Waste Time
The average salesperson today wastes a fully 50 percent of his or her working time. According to research, he comes in a little later, works a little slower, and leaves a little earlier. He spends most of his working time in idle chitchat with coworkers, personal business, reading the paper, drinking coffee, and surfing the internet. Winners arrive a little earlier, work a little harder, and stay a little later.

Develop Empathy and Understanding
Top salespeople have high levels of empathy, i.e., they really care about their customers. Ambition, the desires to achieve, combined with empathy, the genuine caring for the well-being of your customers, are the twin keys to top sales performance. A person with empathy makes every effort to get inside the mind and heart of the customer and to understand his situation and needs.

Keep Your Word
Top-selling salespeople are impeccably honest with themselves and with others. There is no substitute for honesty in selling. Earl Nightingale once said, "If honesty did not exist, it would have to be invented as the surest way of getting rich."

Do What you Love to Do
One of the secrets of success in selling is for you to do what you love to do. Top salespeople love what they are selling. They believe in it passionately. They will defend it and argue over it. They will talk about it day and night. When they go to bed, they think about their product. When they wake up in the morning, they can hardly wait to talk to prospects about it. Look at the top salespeople in the very best companies, and you'll find that these people are fanatical, about their products and services.

Action Exercise
Resolve today, that you are going to become one of the hardest-working professional salespeople in your industry; start earlier; work harder; stay later.

To Lead, Start with Yourself

2009-12-22T16:48:00.001-08:00

John C. Maxwell December 22, 2009

As a leader I frequently get asked the question: What is my greatest accomplishment— the greatest thing I have ever seen happen as a leader? And after reading an Earl Nightingale article he titled “The Greatest Things,” I thought I would compile my own list of a leader’s greatest “things.”

The list I am going to share with you over the next few months is very subjective. I suggest that after I share them with you, you do your own assessment—because there is no right or wrong answer. What I am giving you is my own subjective and personal thinking on leadership. So let’s get started with the first one.

The Leader’s Greatest Victory—Victory over Self

My greatest victory every day is victory over self. I don’t want to put this in past tense because this is a daily battle I have to fight. Not a day goes by where I don’t have to work on myself and battle the temptations of self.

When people think of leadership, the common thought is a leader’s greatest victory is with others. That is a normal and understandable thought process. Because what do leaders do? They lead others. They are taking people someplace, right?

I have found that most of my problems in leadership are my problems. It’s like the guy who said, “If I could kick the person most responsible for my troubles, I wouldn’t be able to sit down for a week, because I would be kicking myself.”

Halfway though writing my book Leadership Gold, which is a compilation of 26 of the most important lessons I have learned as a leader, I realized I learned almost every lesson because I did it wrong. In other words, the lesson was learned not because I was smart or got it right, but because I messed up. I had to reverse and ask myself some questions, like, How did I get that wrong and what could I have done better?

When I work with leaders, many of the problems they have with people are their own problems. It reminds me of when I was doing a conference and a college student raised his hand and said to me, “John, I love all this leadership information, but I don’t have a team yet. So who should I start leading?” And my answer to him was start with himself. Because if you wouldn’t follow yourself, why should anyone else? The philosopher Plato said, “The first and best victory is to conquer self.”

Ralph Stayer, president of Johnsonville Foods, wrote: “In most situations, I am the problem. My mentalities, my pictures, my expectations form the biggest obstacles to my success.” I think Ralph was feeling what I felt many times. He found the enemy, and it was himself.

In my book Winning with People, there are some people principles that address victory over self. Let’s take a look at a couple.

The Lens Principle: Who we are determines how we see others.

This principle says once we get our own act together, we will be able to help others get their acts together. It’s impossible, if I am an unhealthy leader, to have healthy followers. I have to fi x myself. We don’t see others as they are; we see others as we are, because each of us has his or her own bent and that colors our view of everything.

What is around us doesn’t determine what we see. What is within us does. For example, if I am an untrusting person, how do you think I will see you? I will see you as untrustworthy. I am going to view you not as you are but as I am. I am going to look at you through the lens of John Maxwell. So anything that is unhealthy about me is going to spill onto you. This is what leaders have to understand.

As a leader, if I can get victory over myself, if I can fix John Maxwell, the odds are high I can help fix others. If I can’t fix myself, the odds are high I will never be able to add value to and help others.

The Mirror Principle: The first person we must examine is ourselves.

People unaware of who they are and what they do often damage relationships with others. The way to change that is to look in the mirror.

A leader’s tendency is to examine someone else, asking what is wrong with that person. Why aren’t they doing their job correctly?

Why don’t they ever come to work on time? Unfortunately this is how many leaders react. It’s easy to teach leadership; it’s difficult to model leadership.

Within the first six months of becoming a pastor, I came up against a real issue that I had to settle within my heart. It centered on the question, How do I teach my congregation a biblical passage I wasn’t living correctly or falling short of? What was I going to do with that teaching session?

I grew up in a culture that would say just fake it until you make it and just tell them how to live and move on. But I wasn’t comfortable with that. I remember sitting down with my wife, Margaret, and discussing this with her. And I made a determination early on as a young pastor that I would never teach what I didn’t live.

And I went to my congregation and told them I was very young and inexperienced, and there may be times when I bring in other pastors to teach certain principles. And if that happens I will come and sit with them in the pews and take notes alongside them. I have tried my whole life to live that principle of not trying to export something I don’t possess. That’s why victory over self is so essential for the leader.

Author Terry Felber in his book Am I Making Myself Clear? said the following:

There’s something innate in us that looks out for our own interests before those of others. If I take a photograph of a group you are with, who is the first person you look for in the picture? Yourself, of course! You’ll think to yourself, look at my hair! It’s all messed up! And my eyes are half closed. Look at that crooked smile on my face. The most important person to you is yourself.

A key difference between followers and leaders is very simple. Followers think of themselves first, leaders think of others first. Putting others before yourself is a key victory for a leader.

John C. Maxwell is a leadership expert, speaker, author and founder of EQUIP, a nonprofit that has trained more than 5 million leaders in 126 countries worldwide. A New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and BusinessWeek best-selling author, Maxwell has written more than 50 books, including The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, Developing the Leader Within You, and The 21 Indispensable Qualities of a Leader. His blog can be read at JohnMaxwellOnLeadership.com.

Acknowledge and Appreciate Yourself TODAY!

2009-12-20T17:59:00.000-08:00

by Jack Canfield

With the year coming to a close, it's time to acknowledge and appreciate yourself for everything you've accomplished today, throughout the year, and in life.

How many times have you succeeded in the past month? Are you able to recall your successes as well as your failures and missteps?

Many people under-appreciate the little things they accomplish every day. And yet they can recall in detail all the times they have failed or made mistakes. That's because the brain remembers events more easily when they're accompanied by strong emotions.

You might recall graduation, losing 10 pounds, winning an award, or landing a highly sought after position.

But do you include in your successes how you had a really great talk with your spouse, how you spent quality time with your teen, how you got all your list of things done for the day, how you learned to change your own oil, or got your fussy child to take a nap?

If you don't acknowledge your successes the same way you acknowledge your mistakes, you're sure to have a memory full of blunders.

Toot your own horn and don't wait for anyone else to praise you!

If you only remember the mistakes and failures, you won't be as ready to take risks that will lead to your successes. Build your self-esteem by recalling ALL the ways you have succeeded and your brain will be filled with images of you making your achievements happen again and again.

The more you acknowledge your past successes, the more confident you become in taking on and successfully accomplishing new ones.

Take time to write your achievements down.

To really convince yourself that you're a succcessful person who can continue to achieve great things, I'd like to challenge you to list 100 or more of your life successes.

Start when you were very young and think of all your achievements since then. Don't just pick the big things, write down all the things you take for granted. Thinks like, learning to ride a bike, singing solo at church, getting your first job, or leading a fund-raising campaign.

You should also begin to create a Victory Log of your daily successes and review it anytime you are faced with a new challenge. By writing it down everyday, you're securing it in your long-term memory, which enhances your self-esteem and builds your confidence.

Surround yourself with reminders of your success.

We know from research that what you see in your environment has a psychological impact on your moods, your attitudes, and your behavior. Your environment has a great deal of influence over you. And here's an even more important fact: You have almost total control over your immediate environment.

Put up pictures, articles, trophies, awards and other symbols of your past achievements that remind you about your past successes. Make a special place - a special shelf, wall or section of your home or office that you pass by every day and fill it with your success symbols.

This will have a powerful effect on your subconscious mind and will subtly remind you that you are someone who has consistent success in life!

This is also a great thing to do for your children. Proudly display their success symbols as well.

People like to be around those who have a healthy self-esteem and who are achieving their goals. Commit to acknowledging your achievements and your brain will begin to tell you the truth... that you can do ANYTHING!

Taking just 30 minutes to complete this activity will become your positive springboard into 2010 for even more successes.

Goal Setting Tips - By Joan Breiner & Susyn Reeve

2009-12-14T16:44:00.001-08:00

Your dreams can become a reality by using these tips for setting goals, as you improve your self-esteem and nourish a positive attitude.

Do you have a dream or a vision for your life? Have you identified the thoughts and actions that will allow your dream to come to form? Not having a vision, dream, or goal for yourself is like being on a boat with no destination in mind, drifting aimlessly wherever the wind and currents take you.

Often people with a negative attitude and low self-esteem feel they have no control of their destiny. They spend time reacting to life as opposed to creating the life they want. Setting goals for yourself puts you in control, sets your course - you choose the direction for your life. When you have a clear focus, you have less stress, more self-confidence, improved concentration and greater peace and happiness.

You are responsible for your life, not your husband, not your parents, not your boss, not your friends. This recognition puts you in the driver's seat and automatically builds self- esteem.

There are different types of goals. Life Goals are the general desires and big dreams that you want to achieve during your lifetime, such as a fulfilling job, financial security, a beautiful home. Action Goals are measureable, specific goals related to time-specific events - the 'stepping stones' leading you towards your life goal. For example: You may desire to have a fulfilling job in an exciting field, and to reach this goal you must first complete the specific action goal of finishing the necessary schooling.

Remember: Since you don't know how long your life will be -- if you aren't focused on your Life Goals each day and if your Action Goals don't relate to your Life Goals then it will very hard for you to be successful in accomplishing your Life Goals. This is why is it so empowering to first identify your Life Goals and then determine your Action Goals.

It is crucial that you have a strong desire and passion for any Life Goals you set for yourself. They shouldn't be based on what other people think you ought to do. If you are not absolutely passionate about the goal, vision, or dream, then you will be easily discouraged and more likely to lose your focus and quit as soon as you are faced with obstacles and challenges.

Remember: Blocks and Obstacles give you the opportunity to survey the territory and strengthen your commitment to your goals.

Once you define your vision, imagine yourself living your life with your Life Goal fully accomplished. Does it make you feel excited and energized or tired and overwhelmed? Ask yourself, "If I could have it, would I take it?" If your answer is, "No," then adjust your goal until you are able to answer this question with a resounding, "Yes." Then Go For It!

Live Your Dreams - Goal-Setting Process:

1. Identify your dreams, visions, goals: Answer the following questions:
a. What do I want?
b. What would I like my obituary to say about my life?
c. What's on my 'bucket list' of things I would like to do, accomplish in my life?
d. What is my heart song?
2. Ask the Test Question -- If I could have it, would I take it? Adjust your goal until you can answer the test question with a resounding, YES.
3. Affirm your dreams, vision, goals: Create the following:
a. Affirmations written in the present tense reinforcing your desired result: I am financially secure. I have a loving, supportive, nourishing relationships with my family.
b. A Vision Board Collage of images and words that represent your vision fully accomplished. Look at your Vision Board daily to connected in your heart and mind with your hearts' desire.
4. List the thoughts, words and actions that support the full accomplishment of your goals.
5. Specify the Action Goals including specific deadlines.
6. Take Action in your thoughts, words and behavior that reflect your commitment to your vision.
7. Acknowledge Success along the way. When you acknowledge your success along the way you energetically nourish yourself and deepen your focus on your desired result.
8. Create and Adjust make adjustments to your Action Goals as you become aware of new information along the way.
9. Allow Success by affirming your desired result before you can even see it.
10. Ask for Support and help when you become unsure of success and are discouraged by obstacles and challenges.

Remember: Allow time for setting your Life Goals. Once you know what you want, and your heart and mind are aligned the next steps will present themselves and your actions will naturally support your hearts' desire. Your main tasks in living your dreams is to define your goals, have faith in your ability to be successful and take actions in your thinking, speaking and behavior that reflect your hearts' desire.

©2009 Susyn Reeve & Joan Breiner. All Rights Reserved -- http://www.selfgrowth.com/guide/joanandsusyn.html

Five Rules for Entrepreneurship

2009-12-10T17:01:00.001-08:00

By Brian Tracy

Entrepreneurship is the art of finding profitable solutions to problems. Every successful entrepreneur or business person has been able to identify a problem and come up with a solution to it before someone else did. Here are the five rules for success.

1. Find a Need and Fill It
Human needs and wants are unlimited. Therefore, the opportunities for entrepreneurship and financial success are unlimited as well. The only constraint on the business opportunities available to you are the limits you place on your own imagination.

2. Find a Problem and Solve It
Wherever there is a widespread and unsolved customer problem, there is an opportunity for you to start and build a successful business.

Once upon a time, before photocopies, the only way to type multiple copies of a letter was with carbon paper places between sheets of stationary. But a single mistake would require the typist to go through and erase the mistakes on every single copy. This was enormously clumsy and time consuming.

Then a secretary working for small company in Minneapolis began mixing flour with nail varnish in order to white out the mistake she was making in her typing. Soon, people in other offices began asking for it. The demand became so great that she quit her job and began working full-time manufacturing what she called “Liquid Paper.” A few years later, the Gillette Corporation came along and bought her out for $47 million cash.

3. Unlimited Opportunities
There are problems everywhere. Your job is to find one of these problems and solve it better than it has been solved in the past. Find a problem that everyone has and see if you can't come up with a solution for it. Find a way to supply a product or service better, cheaper, faster, or easier. Use your imagination.

4. Focus on the Customer
The key to success in business is to focus on the customer. Become obsessed with your customer. Become fixated on your customer's wants, needs, and desires. Think of your customer all the time. Think of what your customer is willing to pay for. Think about your customer's problems. See yourself as if you were working for your customer.

5. Bootstrap Your Way to Success
Once you have come up with a problem or idea, resolve to invest your time, talent, and energy instead of your money to get started. Most great personal fortunes in the United States were started with an idea and with the sale of personal services.

Most great fortunes were started by people with no money, resources, or backing. They were started by individuals who came up with an idea and who then put their whole heart into producing a product or service that someone else would buy.

Action Exercise
Look for business opportunities everywhere, develop, an entrepreneurial mind-set, and continually be open and curious about the needs not satisfied and problems not solved.

One idea is all you need to make your first million.

2009-12-09T16:51:00.000-08:00

Giving Abundance

“One of the greatest gifts you can give to anyone is the gift of attention.” —Jim Rohn

“It is one of the most beautiful compensations of life that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Realize that true happiness lies within you. Waste no time and effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world outside. Remember that there is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.” —Og Mandino

“We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.” —Norman MacEwan

“Wherever you go, whomever you meet, look for an opportunity to help, to inspire, to lend support.” —Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson

“The charity that is a trifle to us can be precious to others.” —Homer

“Love only grows by sharing. You can only have more for yourself by giving it away to others.” —Brian Tracy

“The duty of helping one’s self in the highest sense involves the helping of one’s neighbors.” —Samuel Smiles

“You can’t be too kind or too generous.” —Patricia Fripp

Time for You by Ron White

2009-12-09T16:50:00.001-08:00

He was completely infatuated with her. It was all that he could think and talk about. Yet, every time that he asked her on a date, he received the same reply. She told him that she would love to go out with him, but her schedule of work, school and other commitments was just too hectic and it wasn’t possible.

In his frustration, he came to me and asked me for advice. He wanted to know how he could creatively help her with some of her responsibilities and free up some commitments so that they could spend time together. When he made this suggestion to me, I sighed deeply and bit my lip. I was searching for a tactful way to break the news to him. I have never reached tremendous success in my efforts to be tactful, so I just let him have it.

“Man, when she tells you that she doesn’t have time, what she means is that she doesn’t have time for YOU. I suggest that you dress in black for a week and pretend as if she’s dead because it isn’t going to happen.”

My words seemed to have been a kick to the gut that knocked all the air out of his lungs. After a few seconds of silence, he raised his head as he came up for air. “Thanks, buddy—I needed to hear that” was his beaten reply to me. After our conversation, he left. I do believe that, although he didn’t dress in black for a week, he did take my advice and move on. I am sure that both he and the woman are grateful for that.

You see, I have never seen a woman (or a man) who is head over heels attracted to someone, yet just can’t find the time to be with that person. If the interest is there, the time will be there.

In life, you often hear the excuse “I just don’t have the time” when someone wants to spend more time with family, start their own business, chase a goal, travel or volunteer. You have the time. You are simply spending it somewhere else. You are a human and will make time for what you see as a priority. The question is: Are you prioritizing the correct things?

You have the exact same amount of time in a day that Albert Einstein, Marie Curie, Copernicus and Leonardo da Vinci had. You have the exact same amount of time in a day that Michael Dell, Bill Gates and Oprah Winfrey have. The question is not, Do you have the time? The question is, How are you spending the time that you do have?

Begin to keep a journal and log the time you spend doing things every day. Do this for at least two weeks. Track the time you spend getting ready for work, driving your car, working at the office, eating out, reading, watching television, surfing the Internet or simply doing nothing. You may be surprised at the amount of time that you spend on unproductive matters. It is very often shocking the amount of time each day that we squander and will never get back.

Zig Ziglar penned the term automobile university. It is the answer for everyone who says they don’t have time to learn a new skill, a foreign language or gain an education on the mysteries of the day. Ziglar suggests that if you simply listen to audio programs as you drive every day, you can successfully use the time to gain a new skill or improve your education. This is effective time management.

Life can often become so overwhelming that, as we get caught up in the rat race, we are not aware of how we are spending our time. It may be time for a time inventory of your life. First, begin by journaling what is most important to you in your life. Then, track how you spend your time for two weeks. It could be very eye-opening.

Remember, you have the same amount of time in a day that Einstein, Henry Ford and Leonardo da Vinci had. The question is: Are you using your time as effectively as they did? You have no cause to complain for your lack of time, only your management of that time. Time plays no favorites. You make time every day for what you value. What do you value?

—Ron White

The Formula For Failure and Success

2009-12-08T16:59:00.000-08:00

- by Jim Rohn

Failure is not a single, cataclysmic event. We do not fail overnight. Failure is the inevitable result of an accumulation of poor thinking and poor choices. To put it more simply, failure is nothing more than a few errors in judgment repeated every day. Now why would someone make an error in judgment and then be so foolish as to repeat it every day?

The answer is because he or she does not think that it matters.

On their own, our daily acts do not seem that important. A minor oversight, a poor decision, or a wasted hour generally doesn't result in an instant and measurable impact. More often than not, we escape from any immediate consequences of our deeds.

If we have not bothered to read a single book in the past ninety days, this lack of discipline does not seem to have any immediate impact on our lives. And since nothing drastic happened to us after the first ninety days, we repeat this error in judgment for another ninety days, and on and on it goes. Why? Because it doesn't seem to matter. And herein lies the great danger. Far worse than not reading the books is not even realizing that it matters!

Those who eat too many of the wrong foods are contributing to a future health problem, but the joy of the moment overshadows the consequence of the future. It does not seem to matter. Those who smoke too much or drink too much go on making these poor choices year after year after year... because it doesn't seem to matter. But the pain and regret of these errors in judgment have only been delayed for a future time. Consequences are seldom instant; instead, they accumulate until the inevitable day of reckoning finally arrives and the price must be paid for our poor choices - choices that didn't seem to matter.

Failure's most dangerous attribute is its subtlety. In the short term those little errors don't seem to make any difference. We do not seem to be failing. In fact, sometimes these accumulated errors in judgment occur throughout a period of great joy and prosperity in our lives. Since nothing terrible happens to us, since there are no instant consequences to capture our attention, we simply drift from one day to the next, repeating the errors, thinking the wrong thoughts, listening to the wrong voices and making the wrong choices. The sky did not fall in on us yesterday; therefore the act was probably harmless. Since it seemed to have no measurable consequence, it is probably safe to repeat.

But we must become better educated than that!

If at the end of the day when we made our first error in judgment the sky had fallen in on us, we undoubtedly would have taken immediate steps to ensure that the act would never be repeated again. Like the child who places his hand on a hot burner despite his parents' warnings, we would have had an instantaneous experience accompanying our error in judgment.

Unfortunately, failure does not shout out its warnings as our parents once did. This is why it is imperative to refine our philosophy in order to be able to make better choices. With a powerful, personal philosophy guiding our every step, we become more aware of our errors in judgment and more aware that each error really does matter.

Now here is the great news. Just like the formula for failure, the formula for success is easy to follow: It's a few simple disciplines practiced every day.

Now here is an interesting question worth pondering: How can we change the errors in the formula for failure into the disciplines required in the formula for success? The answer is by making the future an important part of our current philosophy.

Both success and failure involve future consequences, namely the inevitable rewards or unavoidable regrets resulting from past activities. If this is true, why don't more people take time to ponder the future? The answer is simple: They are so caught up in the current moment that it doesn't seem to matter. The problems and the rewards of today are so absorbing to some human beings that they never pause long enough to think about tomorrow.

But what if we did develop a new discipline to take just a few minutes every day to look a little further down the road? We would then be able to foresee the impending consequences of our current conduct. Armed with that valuable information, we would be able to take the necessary action to change our errors into new success-oriented disciplines. In other words, by disciplining ourselves to see the future in advance, we would be able to change our thinking, amend our errors and develop new habits to replace the old.

One of the exciting things about the formula for success - a few simple disciplines practiced every day - is that the results are almost immediate. As we voluntarily change daily errors into daily disciplines, we experience positive results in a very short period of time. When we change our diet, our health improves noticeably in just a few weeks. When we start exercising, we feel a new vitality almost immediately. When we begin reading, we experience a growing awareness and a new level of self-confidence. Whatever new discipline we begin to practice daily will produce exciting results that will drive us to become even better at developing new disciplines.

The real magic of new disciplines is that they will cause us to amend our thinking. If we were to start today to read the books, keep a journal, attend the classes, listen more and observe more, then today would be the first day of a new life leading to a better future. If we were to start today to try harder, and in every way make a conscious and consistent effort to change subtle and deadly errors into constructive and rewarding disciplines, we would never again settle for a life of existence – not once we have tasted the fruits of a life of substance!

This article is kindly reprinted from Jim Rohn website. Please visit Jims website at http://www.JimRohn.com

The Truth About Frogs

2009-11-30T16:47:00.000-08:00

By Brian Tracy

Mark Twain once said that if the first thing you do each morning is to eat a live frog, you can go through the day with the satisfaction of knowing that that is probably the worse things that is going to happen to you all day long. Your "frog" is your biggest, most important task, the one you are most likely to procrastinate on if you don't do something about it.

Conquer the Hardest Task First
If you have to eat two frogs, eat the ugliest one first. This is another way of saying that if you have two important tasks before you, start with the biggest, hardest, and most important task first. Discipline yourself to begin immediately and then to persist until the task is complete before you go on to something else.

Don't Procrastinate
If you have to eat a live frog at all, it doesn't pay to sit and look at it for very long. The key to reaching high levels of performance and productivity is to develop the lifelong habit of tackling your major task first thing each morning. You must develop the routine of “eating your frog” before you do anything else and without taking too much time to think about it.

Take Action Immediately
Successful, effective people are those who launch directly into their major tasks and then discipline themselves to work steadily and single-mindedly until those tasks are complete. “Failure to execute” is one of the biggest problems in organizations today. Many people confuse activity with accomplishment. They talk continually, hold endless meetings, and make wonderful plans, but in the final analysis, no one does the job and gets the results required.

Develop a Positive Addiction
You can actually develop a “positive addiction” to endorphins and to the feeling of enhanced clarity, confidence, and competence that they trigger. When you develop this addiction, you will, at an unconscious level, begin to organize your life in such a way that you are continually starting and completing ever more important tasks and projects. You will actually become addicted, in a very positive sense, to success and contribution.

No Shortcuts
Practice is the key to mastering any skill. Fortunately, your mind is like a muscle. It grows stronger and more capable with use. With practice, you can learn any behavior or develop any habit that you consider either desirable or necessary.

Action Exercise
What is your “frog?” What is the one task that you despise doing each day? Once you have chosen your “frog,” make it a habit to wake up every morning and do that task first.

The Secret To Effective Time Management

2009-11-30T16:31:00.000-08:00

by anthony on November 30, 2009

The best time management lesson you can ever learn is that you cannot manage time.

No matter how many books you read or how many seminars you attend, you will never be able to gain an extra second in a day, bring back a moment that has passed, or make time move more quickly.

Despite all our best efforts to manage it, time continues to flow with complete disregard for our complex time management techniques. Does this mean that time management is a pointless exercise?

No – not at all… What it actually means is this:

What we commonly refer to as time management is not really about managing time – It is about managing ourselves.

Here’s an example that illustrates why this is so important:

Ben was an accountant in a prestigious accounting firm who was working very long hours in order to move ahead in his career.

One night over a late dinner, his wife said, “Be careful honey, one day you’re gonna wake up and your little girl will have gone off to college and you will have missed everything.”

This comment really struck a chord with Ben. He knew he needed to spend more time at home but he didn’t know what else he could do to manage his time better. He was already utilizing his mobile phone, an electronic organizer and a calendar on his computer.

The next day, Ben chatted to his dad who advised him that effective time management was not about managing time, but rather, about managing himself.

Ben took this idea on board and instead of looking for external ways to control his time, he began to focus internally on finding better ways to manage himself.

Instead of spending the first twenty minutes of his day chatting with his colleagues in the tea room, he picked up a coffee on the way to work and headed straight to his desk.

Rather than spending the first hour of his day answering emails, he wrote down a list of the most important things he needed to achieve and immediately began working on the first task.

He also closed down his Internet browser so that he would not be distracted by Facebook, Twitter, or the ebay auction he was watching.

When printing his documents he realized he should check the print queue before walking across the office and standing around waiting for other people’s documents to be completed.

Ben was genuinely surprised by how many ways he found to improve his productivity simply by shifting his focus from managing time to managing himself. His new mantra became that he would:

Spend Quality Time at Work in Order to Spend Quantity Time at Home

With this new approach to managing himself, Ben developed the view that any time he wasted at work was time he was taking away from being with his family.

This new perspective made him more motivated and productive than ever before. By getting more done during work hours, he was able to cut down on his overtime and ultimately spend more time with his family.

So today, I’d like to encourage you to realize that while you cannot manage time – you can manage yourself.

Instead of looking for additional ways to regulate your time, turn your focus internally and look for better ways to manage yourself and your actions.

By improving the way you manage yourself, you will greatly increase your productivity. This is in turn will help you accelerate your progress towards achieving your most important life goals.

Until next time,
Dare To Dream!
Anthony

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Create Your Daily Personal Growth Schedule

A Success Lesson From the Past

by anthony on January 15, 2010

5 Reasons Why Dreams Don't Take Flight by Dr. John C. Maxwell

What Do You Want? by Jack Canfield

The Law of Superb Execution

Unleashing the Power - Tony Robbins

Helping people reach their greatest potential

Developing a Powerful Sales Personality

To Lead, Start with Yourself

John C. Maxwell December 22, 2009

Acknowledge and Appreciate Yourself TODAY!

Goal Setting Tips - By Joan Breiner & Susyn Reeve

Five Rules for Entrepreneurship

Giving Abundance

Time for You by Ron White

The Formula For Failure and Success

The Truth About Frogs

The Secret To Effective Time Management

找出熱情堅持理想 - 劉揚銘